Colored Rogue

Off its shadowy silhouette
Starkly outlined against crimson
Flailing to reach out to sublime gray
Pops up tiny indigo
Mingling pink, spread over burnt brown toast of yesterday morning.
Its stench green of rotten fungi
Pale with yawning yellow, weeping purple.
Stains of silver on shimmery scarlet
Turning into morbid mahogany....

Off all colored whims on weird white
Eyes wake up to the call of a harsh bellow.
New dreams keep senses shrouded,-
Bereft of the estranged reality-
Of shadowy silhouette,
Of crimson refuge,
Of sublime gray,
Of indigo dot,
Of smothering pink,
Of stench green,
Of yawning yellow,
Of choked purple,
Of silver streaks
On splendid scarlet....

It's Real dream, nothing but the morbid mahogany!

Reviews

[RDOriginal]

There's some excellent word play in this poem and although the abstract nature perhaps does not convey a story or message in the strictest sense I think this is a poweful piece nonetheless.

The most obvious feature I'm drawn to in this poem is the extensive use you have made of alliteration. There are some real classic pairs in here such as - "yawning yellow", "shimmery scarlet" and "morbid mahogany". The fact that they're not perhaps in keeping with the normal links between colours and feelings we have come to expect (e.g. jaundiced yellow or envious green) makes them even more attractive. They cause the reader to pause and think for a moment rather than skip on reading.

The overall effect of this poem is a kaleidoscope of colours and images and that makes it a very enjoyable read.

[Abdul Aziz]

I always like simplicity in poetry, but extravanzas like these are few and far between, so let me soak in this poem's literary grandeur.

Great job!

[Dinesh Sairam]

Forgot to rate it, will do it now :D

[The Uncommon Muse]

you know you do have a way with verbosity in your poetry and little by little it grows on me. I think I like this one the most so far of your work...the one thing that I always seem to struggle with is that sometimes the message of your work gets lost in your word play...so I'd really love to see you work more on bringing your message to the front a bit more.

[zombiikillah666]

yay !! i mean...shoot!
my toast is burnt.
hey, i really like this
poem. its fancy.. (:

[Ruth]

A state of alert! A dramatic vision within a dream state aura!
This is awesome word play love!
Surreal and a pleasure to read!
xx

[Dinesh Sairam]

I'm afraid, colors mean different things to people from different cultures (Even sometimes, people of the same culture). For instance, 'Red' denotes poverty in most parts of India, while in China, it's the color of purity. Maybe a person with same thoughts as you, will understand the poem fully and like it. For me, I'm really unsure as to what the poem intends to say (Is it just the imagery? or Something beyond?). "Bereft of the estranged reality" was a neat verse. Other than, I can't say any proper comments for this, just that 'Something didn't connect' :) Hope you don't take it to the heart. Kudos.

Keep writing :)

[sumit]

hmmmm..... really a bit difficult to understand in first time... i would prefer ur view..