Identity

Same old self- angst..

Diving deep into an ocean of tormented turbulence,
Swimming past the waves of ferocity,
A lonely mind finds the joy underneath.
The call of pride fills a conscience of constant conflicts,
And an indrawn breath relives the insanity.

The vanity of intellect still snarls at a mind,
The mind gasps and tries to find-
words that echo the ecstasy of waves..
And the waves recede the shore of sanity...

Reviews

[Fabian G. Franklin]

"The vanity of intellect "...I like that a lot. "Vanity of vanities, all is vanity." Shelley had us looking at Ozymandias trying to show us how small we were but the Hubble space telescope has made that pretty obvious I would think. My friend said, "If there is a "God", we are like like dustmites on a small piece of worn furniture; pretty insignificant." I replied with, Well, how do you know? God might be a chicken and the universe is just an egg that hatched...in which case, there will be other eggs; at which we both burst out laughing. It's a big selfish world full of little selfish people who like to think they are big. Humility is a good thing.

[Crowley]

I liked this, it may be among your best that I have read. the vanity of intellect is a powerful line with powerful implications, and much the problem with people regardless of time or place. Nice write.

[Ryan Falzon - Tymon]

I really liked the "vanity of intellect" as sated by many others. Great write!

[TadKent]

I do like the "vanity of intellect". Very clever. I love this poem especially, because there's such a contrast in it, within lines. First you talk about turbulence, and the coming of a internal storm, but then you describe a joy found underneath it all.
Very well constructed. I can tell this poem was thought out and not just scribbled out.

[The Uncommon Muse]

you imagery as always is wonderfully brilliant, and your cohesion in this piece is one of your best...I dont get a lot of angst...more self reflection, but I truly enjoyed this piece...your verbosity is one of your quirky talents that make me smile

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

Very poingant indeed. Flows very well. Thanks for sharing this.
Light,
SiddARTha

[The Analog Kid]

Nice use of the ocean and the struggle of mind and soul. "And an indrawn breath relives the insanity." Real poignant line here. I like the incomplete feeling...

[Devons]

There is an ambiguity and ambivalence riding together in the metaphorical waters of this poem. The first stanza is a tangle of complex imagery and wording, perhaps just within the grasp of the reader's comprehension - but then I think that the spiritual feelings and thought processes that it is describing are contradictory and abstract in any case.
However, the second stanza rather compensates for the heaviness of the first. This time the meaning is clear; artfully, concisely and enigmatically stated, and with a hint of irony. Overall, the reflective feeling of a maelstrom of the mind and soul is effectively put across, but I think it would have come across with even more power if the piece had only consisted of the last stanza alone. This stanza is excellent, and conveys itself with intensity.

[RDOriginal]

I like this a lot although I wouldn't say there's a huge amount of angst here, maybe more self reflection... The water theme works really well with these images of what's going on in the narrators mind and I particularly like the line, "and an indrawn breath relives the insanity" as we're often told to take a deep breath to calm us but here it's doing quite the opposite. There's a real haunting element to the last stanza as well with the analogy of words and waves. Great stuff!

[Ruth]

There is an incompleteness to this that I LOVE!
No more needed, all said, hard hitting, very cool!
xx

[An owl on the moon]

You share a rich ocean of feeling and thought, painted with the deepest hues... Powefully gripping and moving...