I Don't Like....

I don’t like betrayal.

The feeling of being all alone

Of being lied to and hurt

of feeling like I can trust,

and only being let down,

and let down very hard.

How can I really call it a let down-

when I shatter the moment they start to turn,

When I bleed all the more when I try to piece it together….

I shatter into a million pieces,

With every single word said,

I lie awake at night-

wishing I were dead.

Maybe if there were a beacon,

A light that had stayed beside me-

Maybe then it would be better-

Or, that is what I thought.

I’d thought I’d had someone to stay-

But in the end, they too….

They just turn away.

Dark and lonely-

it hurts so much.

I have to think that it would be easier-

To just give up and lay there.

I don’t like the silence,

That comes just after the fall,

Just before the pain sets it,

The pain you can never shake.

Just before your heart starts to scar,

Scars that never ever fade.

Just after they all turn away,

and never look over their shoulder.

Just after they forget your face,

And decide you were never worth it….

Just before you fade to grey,

And forget-

the smiles,

the light,

the laughs,

the happiness,

the listening,

the love-

Just before you forget-

Everything you used to be...

I don’t like the pain,

Of this heart beating in my chest,

of knowing they left you behind-

and they don’t even care.

They never look back and they don’t even try-

to chase this bitterness away.

I don’t like the tears,

that I now, in the face of the world,

struggle to keep inside.

I hate how they forget how sensitive I am,

That I have a heart of my own,

And that with every creak and groan,

I just want to throw it away.

I don’t want these stupid tears,

These tears I can’t control,

I don’t want them to stay.

All I wanted was for them to recognize,

what they had done that was wrong.

I was going to sit by and wait quietly-

I loved them all so much.

But love is such a risky game,

and those who play are doomed to suffer-

They turn against you,

one by one,

and they take with them,

the last of the sun…..

I may have been wrong,

but not as wrong as them,

who knew I had depressive thoughts-

and continued with their stead.

I can still feel my heart ache with every last tread,

of a foot walking on it,

of a word piercing through it.

Will it give out?

I don’t know how to tell.

But I do know one thing,

If my days are soon due-

I don’t like betrayal,

And I’m not sure that I like you.

Reviews

[Catherine Frain]

This is a very good poem. real emotion filled. Filled with many emotions