Like A Bowl Of Cherries

They say that life is like a bowl of cherries

But I would beg to differ

Unless the bowl were full of holes

With worms right in the center.

For just when you think you’ve got it

Is when you lose it all.

And only when you see the bottom

Is when you truly feel the fall.

I think life is more like a fungus,

Growing fast and deep among us.

Devouring the good and the bad

Leaving us empty and feeling sad.

So the next time someone tells you

With a smile upon their face,

Retort with what I’ve told you

For it’s the end of the human race!

Reviews

[Dr. YumnaKay]

"I think life is more like a fungus,
Growing fast and deep among us."

Life is more about experiences, I think. It could be both depending on how we perceive it..
I liked the imagery here. The last line was dramatic. End of human race seems nearer in terms of humanity...

Good write, Anastasia. Made me think ;) :)

[Najam Us Saher]

Simply amazing.....very thoughtful. I liked it. Yes life is really not as easy as it seems.

[Layla]

Nice and clever.
Love the imagery and rhyme in this one.

[William Liston]

I like it when a poem is witty enough to poke fun yet still maintains profunity in its message, like this one.
Overall, I thought the flow of ideas and descriptions were great. I loved how you started out somewhat lighthearted and gradually became more serious as the poem progressed. I thought the imagery with the "holes in the center" and "growing fungus" was creative ... it was an interesting twist on an idealistic phrase.

If I may critique: I had a quibble with the last line. The idea expressed therein was too dramatic for my taste ... felt like it was forced to fit the rhyme. I suggest using something less dramatic, something that fits with the overall serious tone of the poem while maintaining some satirical wit.

- William Liston

[Stacy Purvis]

Perhaps...however, the exclamation is meant to be dramatic in a humorous way. Fungus, holes, worms, and the end of the human race.
~Stace xxx

[wordman]

a bowl of cherries indeed,with the stims,and the seeds to deal with ,

[Jessica Lima]

Quite dramatic ("end of the human race") but I like the massage over all. specially:

"For just when you think you’ve got it
Is when you lose it all.
And only when you see the bottom
Is when you truly feel the fall."

[Mr.Writer]

Beautifulll!!!! Soooo good! This is soo good! So engaging... powerful! :)
I totally agree with you on this!
Keep it up!! :)

[Tony Jordan]

The clever dick in me wants to say - 'well Stacey, that bowl might be ideal if you happen to be a bird, or a bacteria and so Life goes on - even without us' but the other side of me wants to say 'I understand Stace...I get it...I know how Life can kick you when you're down...You never feel like getting up again' - but we do, rise again, like phoenix from the debris of our own histories because we are cherry-pickers !!'
Very honest writing, painful and direct piece.
Well written my friend.
:)

[Stacy Purvis]

You...Beautiful Soul. 😊 xxx