Not bad. I think the simplicity of this works for you, but be careful not to overdo it. Your rhyme scheme is maybe a little too simple for the overall piece, I think - maybe go for something more complex to contrast with the content.
Nice piece sasha,
It sends beauty in the first stanza quite clearly then flips around to the conveyance of potential loss or hidden love as from a far in it's second. This is short sure, but you grasp an emotion and mental imagery in two stanzas that I would require a minimum of six. So in this I say is both striking and heart gripping.
I can't pick a favorite line as this is not lengthy and the whole of this work is direct and yet mysterious. But I will say this is quite the little piece of art. I question some lines as to their meaning but not in a confused way, more in curiosity, But this is not important unless you're a talker like me. Last thing I felt a little jerked around in the jump from stanza one to two, it felt a little abrupt for the beauty of the piece in the first stanza. May be this is intentional. It is not bad just a little off putting. I love this writing.
Thanks for the read request yet again TLK, Tag I guess I'm it. And Thank you Sasha for your piece of art.
Sincerely
Christopher
100/100
I like it! It has a sort of fortune teller flavor to it. There's a nice shading of words that set the context, the shade of background (paper) for this... water color or pastel impressionist piece. It has a smiling gesture that arranges friendly objects within the mind's eye. Those last two lines send the reader away with both a sense of mystery (who left this bowl full of rose petals on my porch?) and the scent of a warm, rosy embrace; a hug of friendship that seems to say, "I'm here. I see you. You're not alone."
Only one teeny-tiny grammar blip... "The grass will wait for you {to} collect the dew "
A beautifully penned poem...full of loving tenderness....I especially liked the final line..."The small dish full of rose petals nothing more"....
Thanks for sharing this write...:)
BB