Ray of sunlight

Collapsing as this old memory struggles to stand,

I try to steady myself with these shaky hands,

I built this home with ash, 

Exhaled from my lungs 

burning like stale cigarettes, 

and I realize I'm dying, 

coughing up remnants

Giving pieces of myself away,

Like little rays of the sun, before it burns away my skin,

Moving out furniture before the house collapses within,

Take my love before it falls apart, I knew I'd never make it far-

Temporary, ashamed to feel the sunlight, 

guilty to be around such beautiful souls, thinking 

over thinking maybe I am draining their warmth,

From a distance, I'll make you smile,

 Laughter is so contagious,

like a fire spreading in my heart,

But the fire reaches closer and I'm scared I'll put it out.

Take a piece before this entire house collapses in on me,

I promise I'll be happy the entire time,

I don't want anything I don't need anything,

there's nothing to store in a house falling apart,

there's nothing,

I'm nothing,

f**k f**k f**k I'm sorry I'm sorry I said I was sorry so many times but it means nothing,

nothing nothing nothing f*****g nothing,

What beautiful souls, 

around me,

I want to give them everything

                                                                                     

Author's Note

unfinished, I just wanted it to be raw.
Pics of Lil Peep. Always been the artist I most connected and felt similar to. Music and who he was as a person saved my life. 🖤🖤🖤🖤