Back to Life

I could inhale this cold air 

Like everything was fine

Like the tears were just raindrops 

Pelting across the sky 

With ice dripping in my blood, 

Breathe in and I don't know why

-Choke down another pill 

And then it's back to life 

Numb in my f*****g head, 

And numb in my mind, 

I can't feel a thing anymore 

Unless it's with a knife

Watch that metal pierce my skin

To the emptiness inside

Feel the rush of adrenaline

As I'm sent back to life  

Another pill before I sob, 

Before I remember what I've done 

So many faces in my brain-

It's hard to picture who I was 

God knows I disassociate 

From reality when I lie

But choke down another pill

And then It's back to life 

Author's Note

If you give up trying,
I'm better off dying

Reviews

[NotUsinganymore]

I enjoyed the aganozing cries of this poem. It had a good meaning. c:

[LazerRays]

Thank you :)

[barleygirl]

Your poem paints a vivid depiction of how an addict may feel mainly self-loathing for the way he/she finds him/herself many times, doing drugs or needing them. Your depiction is probably true-to-life for all that an addict may be able to see or understand about what's going on. I just kinda miss the part where we get to see WHY this addict is in this bad space . . . what torture inhabited the addict before the drugs? It wouldn't have to be like adding another chapter, but just a few hints along this tortured confessional, letting us see that this person does have some self-awareness about what got him/her here! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[LazerRays]

We'll never know what goes on to cause this addicts pain I guess... Thanks so much for the review :)

[John the Baptist]

Anyone who is even tempted to do hard drugs should read this first. Chilling.

[LazerRays]

If I could save just one person.....

[jacob erin-cilberto]

"my face is slipping into a coma" is a fantastic line.
the one life line left for her....if he gives up...so does she...this is an incredible piece letting us get just to that edge of total darkness...and then coming back from it just enough to edge closer again...much like Sylvia Plath without the drugs...just the passionate affair with death...
so well done, Sarah...
j.

[LazerRays]

Thank you so much...