Slave

I answer when they call and do what they say
For if not torturous pain is what I shall recieve
Silence and obediance are perfect together
For it's the only way I can stay alive

Bound by misery by sorrow makes me stay here
Depression and solitude numbing my painj
Counting the days in darkness until I am set free
A sliver of hope still stays in my heart

When I am good they will feed me
They will let me sleep alone
Give me time to heal and listen to music
Sometimes they'll even do what I ask

When I am bad they will hit me even after I start crying
I'll run to Him and beg for forgivness
And when He lightly pats my head while smiling and then gently wraps his arms around me I sight in relief
For I know they can no longer touch me

Every night my ankle is tied to his bed
He says that He loves me and to sit down
I bite my tongue to hold back the urge to scream or spit in his face
For it's the only way I can stay alive

He smiles that smile while He's f*****g me
That innocent and charming smile I loved when I met Him
The one that used to make me melt, the one that made me follow Him wherever He went and do whatever He asked
Now it makes me sick to my stomach and wanting to die to end this torture

When He's done He'll zip up and free me, saying with that f****n smile that He can't wait to do it again
I wanted to slap His f****n' face and tell Him to go to hell
But I held back, for I knew the consequences I'd recieve
So I was silent and obeyed to his command

Everytime this happens I go to my room and hide under the covers to feel safe
I ask God why he does this to me and let people like Him live
Every night I hear no answer, just silence
The dark no longer somforting like it used to be

I am bound by pain and fear, wishing this will finally end
He treats this like a game, for He knows how to win
He knows my weaknesses, for He threatens their lives if I don't behave
And I know He's not bluffing, for He has killed them right in front of me

I want to see my firneds again, for they have brought laughter and happiness into my life
I want to be reunited with my mother, awaiting her freedom
I want to see my little girl grow up and be there for her, us together once more
I want to know what it feels like to be loved

But I a slave knows that that day may never come
More torture to have if I stay here
So as a slave I know there's only one option
I have to kill myself to be set free.