Till Death

A man who realizes his mistakes too late.

                As I lay dying I look around this horrid room. The walls bleached white and offering no warmth. I know I’m selfish, but I can’t help but let my eyes drift yet again to the door. I imagine a beautiful women graying with age, sweet eyes surrounded by wrinkles. Thin lips set in a small smile as she asks me how I’m doing.

                But no one comes, save for the nurse who periodically checks my chart.

                Disappointment is all I feel and occasionally grief mixed with guilt, for throughout my life I considered myself a business man at heart. Everything became a transaction to me; everything was signed off on and agreed upon over long meetings.

                A kiss for my wife became a task that was to be preformed every morning at eight before I left for work. A simple ‘I love you’ became a customary statement to cut a call short with her.

                I remember how my beautiful wife had wanted kids, but after reviewing the information regarding expenses I deduced that having kids would be irrational in that stage of my career.  

                Everything became numbers and charts and my wife decided to escape that life of calculations. I don’t blame her. She probably found herself a man who knew how to enjoy life. I wish I could have been that man. I always told myself that I would be someday, once I raised enough money to live comfortably, but it seems I missed my chance.

                I waited too long and now my only comfort is the beeping of the heart monitor beside me that assures me that for now I am still alive.

                I’ve had dreams of picking up the phone and calling her up. Telling her what a fool I was, but dreams are called dreams for a reason. I know my place; I’ve picked this cold hospital room over my loving wife. I signed happiness away in return for money and as a businessman I am bound to keep my contract till death.

Reviews

[SquinklaPsyOps]

Ooh my Goodness, what an incredible writer you are. This work is amazing. In my opinion is flawless, it flows smoothly and it makes sense. A lot of persons live their life's like that, and when they go to the other side, there is nobody there to receive them or guide them and money can't buy eternity. I am very impressed, thank you, you have a unique style, you should definitely send read requests invitations to as many persons as possible so they can avoid what happened to that person.

[Sandr]

'Thank you so much, your review means a lot to me. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[Larry Dyson]

what a shame that pride always comes before the fall..and pride followed until death is so difficult to imagine.one may change at any time, we are not held to a cast system in Karma...a new life is only a decision away...

[Angi]

Wow. This one gave me goosebumps. The lesson here is a harsh one. There is not enough time and you can't take money with you. It brings to mind one of my favorite poems. It was written by Raymond Carver.

Late Fragment

And did you get what
you wanted from this life, even so?
I did.
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved, to feel myself
beloved on the earth.

That is really all we can (and should) ask for in the very end. Angi~

[QuietlyCrash]

I am on the verge of tears. This is so sad it breaks my heart. Always a terrible thing when you realize your too late. Fantastic job.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

this is amazing. You thought of this of the top of your head just made it up?
This has such an amazing story to it i love it i enjoyed reading it allot.
Very true allot of men dont realise or appreciate what they have till its to late.
This mistake cost him big time very sad little story.
Maybe a few men acting this way will read this and it will shock them into reality and they will change a little. Great eye opener. Amazing story keep on writing..... Cimmy

[Riding the Rainbow]

This story showed how greedy we can be for money..he lost his loving white for his careear..unfortunately, we prefer that monster called "success" instead of the one called love. Good job..

[Coyote Poetry]

A powerful and true poem. Most of us learn too late to appreciate family and good friends. I like the set-up of the poem. Allow the reader to feel the sad emotion and understanding death was near. Thank you for sharing the excellent story.
Coyote

[stars are far]

That was so nice ...
amazing :)

[Ravyne Hawke]

Sandr, this is an amazing piece of Flash Fiction. I am currently hosting a Flash Fiction contest and I think you should enter: http://www.writerscafe.org/contests/Flash-Fiction-Contest/48597/

I love that your character has depth and warmth to him, that he realizes all he has lost, even if it is too late.. you make your audience feel sympathy towards him.

I am sending RRs out to all on my list.. this deserves to be read.

[Sam A]

Nice job on this. Your character has a certain unexpected nobility to him. I like that.