Your Hardship Every time

I

I want to see smile every time

When I remember you in a day so many times

I was every time innocent of my feeling for you

Your hardship still I save from my heart

When I  am facing lonely  some time

I see your hardship in my heart every time

It's another matter you are greater in your feelings to me

I love every time busy too in sustaining you

Now no matter when you return to see me on time

Till I will alive with you in this life

This is my greatness about you every time,

 Became me crazy about you every time

I want to commitment to you once a time

Before I leave this world you Hug me once a time

So that my soul can be to leave this world with your feelings last time

I

Reviews

[Celie Rose]

Enjoyed reading your poem..A bit confused on your concept of friendship. I sense that it is more than friendship, perhaps a romantic relationship."want to commitment from you once a time.Before I leave this world you Hug me once a time." Lovely poem. Nicely written and well expressed. Keep writing!

[Drcicarlo]

beautiful piece of work! The simple things in life, in my opinion, include a unique friendship. This is divine. My only critique (although it has no affect on the significance of your work) is grammar. A few pronouns and your piece can be open to any audience. I think that you worked really hard on this and it certainly shows. Well done my friend!

[Shy Joe]

It's very clear English is not your first/native language. If you want to continue writing poems in English, I would suggest working on basic English grammar first. I am not trying to criticize you. You could become a great English writer with time and effort.

[Polly]

This is such a sweet piece! Friendship is indeed such a beautiful thing, and you portrayed that perfectly. The only thing that you can improve in this is the grammar. Nonetheless, this was a very fine read. Good job! :)