6.30pm King William St.

the evening      terribly misplaced           under a drizzle
of clouds           behind the Radisson Hotel
somehow make everything along King William
less poetic
 
but no lesser in ambience or mood,
the type of evening that leaves clusters of scarves
like nebular clouds
                  cart-wheeling down the dark boulevard

glistening from the first rains;
becoming shelter for cigarette butts and
walkway pavement, gurgling drains and pink toed shoes.

the plane trees shiver, whispering cheap thoughts
from grumbling commuters
leaving the noise department
to monstrous tour buses, utes and cranes,
taxis &
      people  
      on                   
      people     
making their way towards home-
all the less poetic.

                     Later, as the drizzle continues,

an 86 corolla rolls out to the bus stop beside me.
the guys immediately notice the rockin’ elvis
on the dash; the girls cipher the last bit of conversation
between the new, young couple

noticing the way she touches his thigh

as she ushers him off

quickening the goodbye kiss

that leaves sex on his mind.

 

 

 

16 February

Reviews

[aponijose]

I like the element of irony in this piece. I admire this strong sense of self that you wittily relaxed on my thoughts. More importantly, I am a fan of the way you would harvest the small details in order to get the right amount of paint and the right kind of texture to realize a wonderful vision. Well done.

And, thank you for the comment you left on ...suitcases.

[Blindmikey]

I've always thought word placement was an art in and of itself.
Another tool to guide the reader's emotions.

And that's just what you've done here.
And penned as if I'm there I see the words as if they were my eyes.

Excellent write.

[Emily B]

I love the shapes your words take. I see clouds and trees and kisses. Even kisses. The imagery is repeated not only in the well-chosen words but in the way they are places as well.