CarolineA Story by Samhwaina short story I felt compelled to write in the middle of the night. It just fell to place exactly how it is. I've never tried editing it in anyway, I'm quite pleased with how it is as it is.
Pain was her only comfort. An intense pain that left her body weak
and her mind numb. It was her only relief and the only satisfaction she
got in life. She'd found herself immersed in pain every night. The
fighting down the hall would cause an envelope of pain to develop in her
head. A pain she did not like. Every time she walked through that front
door in the evenings it started. The suffering would begin and she
couldn't wait to escape from it and get to what she wanted. She didn't
like being slapped around like a rag doll.
She didn't like listening to her father tell her what a useless wretch she was and how he should have walked out on her when she was a child. How he should have left her mother to raise her alone, with no child support, and no way to find him. She'd gotten an attitude one night and told him what was keeping him from doing that now. That had earned her a black eye and a fractured cheek bone. Pain she didn't like. Pain she didn't want. She stared at herself in the mirror. Her reflection staring back at her was a miserable excuse for a human being. The skin around her right eyes was black. Her cheek had a nasty gash in it and was tender to the touch. Her hair was long and dark and hung in dull, limp, locks around her. Her skin, what little skin that wasn't bruised, was pale and dull. Her eyes were lifeless and she had a split lip. And that was just the beginning. She knew that if she lifted her shirt up she'd see bruise on top of bruise, fracture on top of fracture. There was nothing but pain on her body. And it wasn't the pain she wanted. She stood up and stepped away from her mirror. heavy footsteps dulled by the carpet and drowned by the fighting downstairs, accompanied her to her bed. She sat down and put her head-phones on, turning her stereo up on max and pressing play. Pain filled her ears, the sound of the band, three days grace she believed it was, lulled her into a trance as she sat there and hugged herself, closing her eyes tight. She just wanted it all to end. She wanted the fighting to stop. She wanted the beatings to end. She wanted the bruises to go away. She wanted it all to just leave her alone. Every time she walked into a class room they asked her what happened. 'I fell down' was her favorite answer. People didn't like accepting that answer, but she left them no choice. She wasn't going to get herself killed just to put that, that thing in jail. Her mother always told her, while father was away 'at work' - f*****g his favorite prostitute - that he wasn't all that bad. He just got a little rough when he had too much to drink. She'd heard about things like that. Her mother was so used to the abuse that she just found an excuse for when he did it. 'Oh he's just a little drunk' or 'I really deserved it. I shouldn't have done this, I should have done that.' or 'he was right, you know, I was out of line.' the most common one Caroline heard was 'It's all my fault.' Her father was never home at night, he was always out drinking, and f*****g his prostitute. her mother would cry herself to sleep, and Caroline would lock herself away in her room to listen to her music until the next morning. She never slept, not any more. Not since the drinking started, and the beatings followed. Her phone rang, and vibrated, lighting up as it bounced around the book in front of her on her bed. She stared at it, watched it dance across the hard-back novel. The caller I.D. said it was her friend, Caleb. He was always trying to get a hold of her at home, when her father was home. He was always trying to get her out of everything. She takes the head phones off and picks up the phone. "What do you want, Caleb." Her voice was a pitiful, dry monotone. There was no life left in it, and as quiet as it was, there was no effort in using it. "Madeline is having a party tonight, you should come." His warm voice reached through the phone and made her grimace. She couldn't stand Madeline, or the other kids at school. They always stared at her, hid behind one hand and whispered, pointing at her. They never spoke to her. They never approached her. When she looked at them they found that whatever was in front of them was the most interesting thing in the world. "Caleb, I don't want to go to a party. I can't. I shouldn't even be on the phone." She used a bit more effort, annoyed with Caleb. "Go to the party yourself." "I can't leave, Caroline. I'm in your yard. If I leave now your dad will hear me and think I was dropping you off or something. I know it. I know him. I know what'll happen to you." Damn him. She gets off her bed and walks over to the window, staring out into the darkness outside. It was hard to see, but she found him sitting in his car. "Please Caroline? Come with me." "Fine." She closes her phone and tosses it onto her bed before pushing her window open. She sat on the window sill for a moment, staring at the ground far, far below. That was when she realized it was silent downstairs. Her father had stopped yelling and her mother wasn't crying. But he hadn't left the house. What was going on? Thump, thump, thump. He was coming up the stairs! That's what was going on. There was no way she'd get back into her room, shut her window, and 'do her homework' before he reached her room. "Caroline! What do you think you're doing!" He yells at her, shoving her door open. "Caroline come here now!" She wasn't a dog, she wasn't going to be summoned like a dog. She scrambled out her window and grabbed the corner of the house where the bricks stuck out far enough for her to climb down. "CAROLINE!" She starts climbing down. He grabs her hair, leaning out the window. "Let go of me!" She screams an clings to the bricks as he yanks on her hair. "Let go of me! You're hurting me!" She didn't dare let go with one hand just to pull her hair free. He'd pull her by the hair back through the window if she did. "CAROLINE! CLIMB!" Caleb was running from his car, waving at her with both hands. She started climbing down, desperate to get free. Her father yanked on her hair and she screamed. He lost his balance, hanging out the window, and yelled at her. "CAROLINE!" Caleb yells rushing towards the house as fast as he could. Her father fell from the window and yanked her head back, pulling her backwards away from the house as he did so. She screamed. "Caroline, wake up, please wake up." Caleb pushes her shoulder gently, afraid to move her. Her father lay in a heap of shattered bones and torn muscles beside her. He'd landed at such an awkward angle. Caroline, caroline landed on her back, curled towards the house. She'd hit her head pretty hard, but by the time she did, she'd already stopped falling. "Caroline, please wake up." He'd wanted to sneak her to the police station. Iåçt was why he'd called her. Oh he'd lied or she wouldn't have come out, but still. "Ca-caleb." She tries to move and he holds her still. "Don't move, Caroline, just talk to me, please. Just talk to me and stay awake." "Ca-leb," she whispers opening her eyes for a second. "T-take care of m-mother." "No! NO! Caroline no!" she stopped breathing as he screamed at her not to go. Not to give up, to please just hang in there. Help was on the way. She didn't move, she didn't breathe. The pain, the pain from the fall. It was so. . . so satisfying. It was so numbing. It was the relief she had been looking for. © 2011 SamhwainAuthor's Note
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Added on October 31, 2011 Last Updated on October 31, 2011 Author
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