Chaos At The Dinner Table: A Pre-Menstrual Story

The ugly effects of estrogen.

 It was approximately the day before the thirtieth (which is approximately Day 1 of my period). 

My mother had made fried chicken cutlets, mashed potatoes, and peas with sauteed onions. Usually a favorite dish of mine, but tonight I could've settled for a tub of chocolate ice cream. But that's beside the point. 

I take a seat at the table, as does the rest of my family. My father sits down with his newspaper, my mother places a bowl of salad next to her plate, and my sister (aka the Prima Donna of my family) comes to the table with her hair in large curls, full make-up, and at least 3 pounds of jewelry. 

My father looks up from his paper and compliments my sister. "Wow. You look beautiful!" Strike one. 

Now, not to say that I'm the jealous type, and I can look pretty when I want to, but not today. Today I am cramped. I am bloated. I am in sweats and I don't want to hear about how good my sister looks. 

But I let it pass. I cut a piece of my chicken cutlet. It's good but it's missing something. Ketchup. 

Some chatter has started about my sister's future career in hairdressing and everyone is deep in conversation. Everyone but me, of course. I stare at the ketchup, wishing I could use telepathic powers to move it towards me. But no, it's directly at my father's fingertips on the far side of the table. 

"Dad, could you pass the ketchup, please?" Ignored. Perhaps he didn't hear me. I wait a moment and then say a little louder, "Dad, could you please pass the ketchup?" No answer.

I'm starting to lose my patience a bit when my mom asks me how my day was. "Was work busy today?" she says, acting mildly interested. I begin to tell her when she interrupts me to tell my dad not to forget to take out the garbage tonight. And that ends our conversation. I think that can be considered strike two.

Meanwhile, I still don't have the ketchup. Luckily for them, my sister happens to grab it, use it, and place it next to her, which is in close proximity to me.

They're lucky because if I didn't get that ketchup soon, there would most likely be a WWF smackdown. 

Their conversation about my sister's career continues as I smother my chicken in the bright red ketchup (I think I sense a little foreshadowing here. Sorry to be gross).

I hate this conversation. Partially because I hear it every day, partially because I'm not a part of it, but most of all because I am bitter. Bitter because I have no idea of  what I want to do with my life. And she does. I used to be happy for her, but she is constantly rubbing it in my face. And so is the rest of my family. 

They love her! She fun and interesting! And beautiful! 

They ignore me! I'm dull and swollen. And angry due to of lack of condiments. 

Strike three.

I get up from the table, tears in my eyes, and run to my room. My whole family is stunned. They have no clue as to what just happened. And to be honest, neither do I! 

 

Reviews

[Boris Jonathan Novak]

I really enjoyed this. I actually found myself giggling over much of it. Life can toss some CRAZY situations at us... and yep... you definitely put it well here! Very interesting, and very well written!

Great work!

[Crazy Cat Man]

Awww man.....I feel guilty for reading this piece....I felt like this is not my business. But you wanted to share your predicament for the world to see by posting this piece.

Awww yes.... when we see someone with a purpose with their life we become jealous becuz we have no idea what to do with our lives at that point. So i can understand your anger, jealousy, and frustration at your sister....... the period makes things worse, it heightens the frustration and of course NO MAn can relate lol.....

I felt like there should be a part 2 to this piece.....but the way you ended it.....seems like you don't have to write more....the writer gets an idea how it ends lol....great piece....you are very entertaining