This poem is for the person name 'ME. I don't know who is he but he is, somewhere.. somewhere in lots of pain, agony, in complete suffering. I was sitting in my university's library when I wrote this poem. Was watching everyone around me, laughing, texting, chatting, mocking, gossiping. I was the only lost soul among those on ones but my picture's background actors. I hope you'll find some meaning in my 'I don't know'. Do let me know your views about it.
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This piece is a little enigmatic, but not overly so. I do like your fourth stanza the most. In the first stanza, 2nd line, you use the word "cognizes." Spell check should have indicated it is not a word. There is cognition, cognizable, cognizance, cognizant or even, cognoscente. In the context here, I think you want cognizant, as in, "Cause no one is cognizant", meaning , fully informed, conscious. Nice write!
Posted 12 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
12 Years Ago
Thank you for the review and I really appreciate that you corrected the mistake. Spell check had ind.. read moreThank you for the review and I really appreciate that you corrected the mistake. Spell check had indicated the error but I didn't bother checking. Thank you again. :)
I think this kind of poem is one of those poems that requires you to know the person who wrote it. It's written wonderfully but with a lot of underlined-hidden context.
It's practically about you ,as you stated, and while reading I uncover more details. Like stuff under the skin.
There are many lost laughing souls. "Everyone" has their own personal storms. How many people commit suicide and friends all say "They seemed so happy?" That's not to diminish your torment. Many of the greatest Poets and Artists were tormented. Personally, I am at my most creative during the storm. I'm often shallow in the sunshine.
You kind of show a picture of ME, I mean me in the real sense. Am not lost but i feel out, out of this world, out of this box, out of cliques, out from own. Your poem is wonderful. I'll mimic BARBARA WALKER, Nice write!
"For everyone in lane " ? not sure about this line.poem oh poem,Carved out a piece of your time. I think you were working hard to corral the emotion you felt with the world stepping in your way,it ticks and clicks but I don't know if you finished what you started.
Seems we take our "insights" where and as we find them.
Using the authors note as a guide, the gestault of the poem makes a sort of strobed-light-splashed across a mindscape sense. The overall flavor is such that I wonder if your translation was quite as efficient or equal to the shades of meaning of your intent. My own mind changed the shades of meaning and I had to return to YOUR words.
Not really much to say about what I am or anything about me. Its like I've never find myself in the spheres of something and something not, I always wander somewhere in between them, all I get is the .. more..