Mr. BigFeet Hates Sex

An honest account of a tragic event.

I woke up on the floor. My mind was clear from a goodnight's rest and everything around me was exactly what I had expected it to be. She was in her bed, her family was roaming around the house, not paying me any mind. She was awake. I wasn't surprised. We had been dating for two months that day, and we had planned a day of events to celebrate the occasion (planned to partake in some events- not actually sure which ones we would attend). For an hour and a half or so, she got ready while I looked on the internet for something to do that day. There were plenty of events, sure, but none really suited us. We decided to just go for it. She asked her mother for money, an argument ensued or some such about the distribution of wealth within her family, and in the end she received Forty dollars from her mother which created an atmosphere I can only describe as bitter. So we left. We argued about who should decide what to do. We went to Starbucks and enjoyed a treat called a Chonga bagel. I don't know what Chonga means, even to this day. During this meal, we decided on a plan- we would go to the mall to pick up these things for her: Perfume. Lotion. Hand Sanitizer. Lunch. Other things, I'm sure, but those are what stuck with me. We went to the mall and she spent about an hour trying to find what perfume I liked- she insisted I choose, because she wanted me to smell like something I liked. On this, she was consistent. We eventually agreed on something, and left. On our way to the food court we crossed the paths of two of our friends and a straggler they had with them. Upon sight, they hugged me. I thought this was odd, but frankly, I enjoyed the attention. As we talked, they smiled and spoke with cheer- but something was wrong with their eyes. they didn't stop looking at me. There was something wrong, something terribly askew, and they knew it, their eyes reeked of pity and that pity could only be for one person- but I didn't recognize it. So, we moved on down to the food court, had lunch, ran into her family, and went home. We spent the rest of the night watch a movie and then I went home at around 9:45 because I had to mow my aunts lawn the next day. Upon my arrival at my house, a began to receive a rapid amount of text messages from her, demanding my presence. It was important. She had to see me in person. It couldn't wait. She called me, I could barely understand her, she was sobbing so hard, but no matter what I said she wouldn't tell me until I came over. My head filled with thought of dead family, maybe a need to move to a different state, so I left. I put on my shoes and trudged through the cold dark night to get back to her house. I found her sobbing. She couldn't speak. I held her, to comfort her as she cried and cried and cried. I told her she had to tell me what was going on. She just shook her head, I kept telling her, she kept shaking her head. 
"Why?" I inquired.
"Because" she sobbed, "You're going to leave".
Naturally, this wasn't the best way to get me to stop wanting to know, even though at this point, I knew anyway. I grabbed the back of her head, not violently, but firmly.
"Say it" is all I could muster.
I was hit by a flurry of "no's" and "Please's" as I put together that my Girlfriend had cheated.
"Just say it. just get this over with". I didn't recognize my own voice.
"I cheated". Sobs.
"When?" I was surprisingly calm.
"At the party on Thursday"
Yes, of course, that party. I was always so concerned about her going out and partying. I was invited, but I had plans, and wasn't much into that kind of fun.
"With who? What happened"
"I was talking to this girl, and she took me upstairs." I was disgusted as she began to deliver the details in sobs of how she and her new lady friend got along upstairs. I zoned out, until the next phrase hit me:
"And then her Boyfriend came in- I had a threesome". 
Sob. Sob. Sob.
I was stone, I didn't know what to feel. I was confused, it didn't seem real, I had always been worried about something like this happening but it never had.
I laid back against the wall, put my hands on my head, and closed my eyes. 
I saw it happening, saw it in my head, and that was when I understood. I became the useless "No's" but my "Please's" became "Oh God's".
I screamed I yelled I threatened I cursed I whisper I questioned I begged. 
And then, as a whole, I fell asleep into a world of dull colors and sad people.
And finally, one day, I woke up.

Author's Note

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[Josephine Nive]

I know the feeling:(