Palpable

Being in a long distance relationship really causes you to reflect and appreciate the little things.

I want to write our own story
together until the ink is all dry.
I want to cross your body
with kisses--
An X that marks the spot
on your chest
Where your heart and lungs rest
and trace the lines
On your hands
and back and face--
Your scars and birthmarks--
the things that prove you are alive
Your very veins that beat with
the same blood as mine
With the same rhythm
and intensity and vitality
And thank the stars that:
You’re alive
and I’m alive
And our breath is one breath,
and our life forms one love,
And at last, you are before me--
This moment so palpable. 

Reviews

[sithlordjp]

"Your scars and birthmarks--
the things that prove you are alive" -Wow, this is beautiful... Makes us unique, the battle scars we carry, on the outside, on the inside. A palpable presence, a moment, an instant. You brilliantly captured the intimacy shared with a loved one, well done!

[Trevor Bushey]

Quite palpable!

"I want to cross your body / with kisses-- ... Your scars and birthmarks-- / the things that prove you are alive"

In context, these lines are so effective at evoking my sympathy for you who pines to touch his physical frame, to validate his too distant existence.

Poignant piece.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i like the scars and birthmarks part the best...but this is all so intensely romantic...because it really shows two people so linked by passion, emotionally, mentally and physically that they are really "one."

powerful together...strong and alive alone, but powerful together.

speaking of the "breath" line in this poem...this got me out of breath...

it started speeding to conclusion...and then i grabbed it at the end and felt it with my heart.

[Michael Kevin Spencer]

This is very personal, it really comes alive! I wish someone could cross my body with kisses like that.

My chest can only beat so many times for the good stuff! And this breathes feeling and nice intensity.

It's natural and easy to read. It's accepting and embracing. I guess your poems thus far are quite feminine and emotionally cohesive.

[Jimi Brady]

This has always been one of my favorites of yours, Amanda. I love the duality and symmetry, and the attention to the small details of the person you're describing (I wonder who that could be). ;)

[The Nude Writer]

Simply beautiful. Well written