Eyes on me

But everywhere I felt Eyes on me. It is real............

EYES ON ME................................... by SADDAM HUSEN

When I was a kid

There was interest little bit

About toxication

 

It was in my mood

“It is a supplement good

For health”

 

I bought tobacco one day

I remember that was day

Of celebration

 

Surprised act for shop-keeper

He fired on me questionnaire

Of its essential

 

I deceive him with lie

I searched many place for unpacked it

But everywhere I felt Eyes on me

A snare bound my hand

It forced me, I could not open it.

Author's Note

I have never taste any kind of "Nasha" (drug, intoxication) and pray for other not to do that.

Reviews

[Irenic]

But everywhere I felt Eyes on me
A snare bound my hand
It forced me, I could not open it.

a poem which which give us the message about existence of god-------- for me.
Like others i will say you are religious and your poem dropped into the bottom of my heart. the last three lines makes me to realize that i commit sins without thinking about him and his eyes towards me.

thank you for writing such a reality realizing poem.

[Saddam]

Thank you so much dear friend. You can say but I'm not that kind of religious but Thank you so much for your stopping dear. I appreciate your words.

[Irenic]

you are welcome :)

[Jamestown]

Wow, the open and honest approach to this piece just makes it
that much better, great job my friend! Thanks for sharing and b-blessed!

[Lyndy]

Nice poem. It's a beautiful one! :D

[Neo]

Sometimes you just can't ignore the feeling of eyes on your back, which in this case it turned out to be a good thing. Thanks for sharing. :)

[Mila]

Very nice poem here, and very powerful too. Well done!

[nazia]

Very well written.. I like your expression of guilt on deceiving people who care for you.. well written

[Raja Anjana Kothapalli]

I love it! This is an awesome write. The words and the entire presentation is too good! Kudoz to you SSADD!

Thanks for sharing.

-Anjana

[Josie E. Cook M. A.]

Conflict and desire in a tug of war with each other,
and your thoughts are magnified with those of others around you,
as you make your decision.
Strong emotion with the fleshing out of beliefs.
Nicely done.

[CA Anurag Sharma]

Drugs are indeed bad... good that you learnt this message early and never tasted it....

[Deepika]

Haha..I hope now you don't find all eyes on you while the cigar's in your hand ;) Good one though, In particular the conflict between exhibiting the expected innocence of a child and the inner desires of enjoying the pleasure of an adult.

[Elisa]

I think the last two lines are particularly powerful. I would say to flesh those out even more/focus on those. Focus on what you were feeling that kept you from opening that box. I think you're addressing a very important issue here, and focusing on how you felt at that moment is how people will be able to relate to your feelings, and this poem in general. :D

[Saddam]

You right dear but those are the effect of Font.
Thanks for sharing your view. I am glad you found it relative for others. Thanks again.