Steps to getting better

Just feelings you can read

You said you loved me

That was a long time ago

The last time I saw you your eyes 

They were empty

I saw no love in your muddy brown eyes

You left me

You said "I can't do this anymore, I'm going crazy, you'll never change."

I felt as if those words Condemned me 

To this sadness, emptiness, hopelessness

To feel broken until I die

I can't escape those words

They echo through my head daily

Constantly beating me up

Telling me how crazy

Reminding me of everything wrong with me

Tormenting me with how everything was my fault

I once thought I'd never change too

So I guess your not the only one that feels that way

But I am slowly changing

You said "Your taking your medication but you aren't getting better."

Depression can't be changed with a magic pill

I would've taken it long ago

Who wants to live this way?

and it angers me I still love you

Because someone who loves another 

doesn't make them feel like a burden for something they cannot control

I say to myself:

I am human and I can get better

I am a good person

I am a strong person

I can go on without you

I can live happily

This wretched sadness is temporary

I deserve to live

Dying is not the solution

I won't be lonely forever

I am worthy of love

Life can be pleasurable 

I deserve kindness

I don't need anyone but myself

I will repeat those words of affirmation

Until I truly believe them

I will love myself

Because then I can get better

So f**k you, f**k you really hard with a giant pole.

Author's Note

Waddup

Reviews

[Tamika]

Wowwww. This is so so sad, and so deep too. Really well written; once again. I adore your poetry so much, and so much of it I can relate too. I especially like the part of this poem which says how he says your too crazy and left you, but after that you changed but you understand why he would've thought you wouldn't change, and the reason I like this so much is because this is LITERALLY what happened to me. I was dumped for being "too crazy" and it broke me. Excellent poem- with so much truth.

[SadBones]

I never saw this review! :( But thank you so my dear! It mean a lot to me that you can relate and that you enjoy my writing.