I decide, its not my time

Pen still writing as the paper's covered with blood
Feelings exhausted as I decide that I'm done

Emotions so electrified
Won't heaven's gates open up for me?
Wanting to put a closure on this life
Disheartening thinking of what I used to be

Hands trembling-
Right hand with my pen
And my left with the knife
Fresh wound reminding me
Of the scars in my life

For so long chasing
The light at the end of the tunnnel
Strange how that light dissapearing
Now has me feeling humble

Rumbling with my convictions
The only thing interfering with my missions
I thought I lost my heart
Somewhere along the way

Troubling are my constrictions
That diminish with my wishes
Heart starting to beat with guilt
As I begin to second guess
Today

Sifting through old photographs
Slowly finding memories that cast
Some of my sorrow
Away

Shaping together the thoughts in my mind
Hoping that faith will guide
Me to write better pages in my life
As I script in red
one final decisive rhyme
I decide
It's not my time

Reviews

[Rita L. Sev]

Second guessing today, or even yesterday, is an energy drain. Sticking it out is worth it, for the words that need to be penned tomorrow... A deep piece, well done Shawn.

[Liyah Rochelle]

I absolutely loved this. It brings forth lots of hard emotions to deal with but at the same time allows your reader to see that there is still more to look forward to in life!

[shawnt5604]

thank you so much! Great insight

[Girl With A Pen]

Nice rhyme scheme. This poem is so dark and yet it really has a deep message to it. Your writing never ceases to amaze me

[shawnt5604]

Thank you so much dear ;) this poem has a lot of deep meaning and is very close to my heart. I'm so glad you enjoyed it