Long and Short of ItA Story by ShannonMy friend Jill is going to one of those hair styling colleges and has been eyeing my long locks since she started. A big transformation at her mid year show would give her grades a boost and get the attention of the best teachers. And hadn't I always planned to donate some of it anyway? Jill was quite convincing when she ticked off the numerous advantages I would gain by cutting my hair. To my chagrin, her list needs a series of provisos. I will give you the real scoop:
“Your head will feel so much lighter.” The way she said this, I assumed it would be akin to a Sherpa dropping his pack at the top of a mountain, burden released, relief palpable. Reality is, your brain will adjust to the change very rapidly. So while you might have a day or two of “hmmm…feels lighter”, you will soon stop noticing. This short transition; however, leads to phantom hair syndrome, whereby you continue to behave as though you have long, flowing locks in your daily life. Imagine the confusion of people, as you lift your non-existent tresses from the back of your coat or toss your head sideways to remove an invisible lock of hair from your face, giving the impression that you have developed a nervous twitch…
“It will be easier to take care of.” Yes and no. Short hair does not tangle so easily, so brushing will be a breeze. It dries in less time. But for some reason, even though your brain will get the message that all that hair was no longer part of your makeup, apparently, it fails to convey this message to your scalp. Specifically, the oil-making parts of the scalp, which will think you still need enough oil to keep an extra 14 inches of hair healthy and shiny. So, despite requiring washing only every second day for the last decade or more, suddenly this will no longer be sufficient to avoid looking like an outdoor enthusiast after a week of backpacking in the cold mountains. All of this washing, of course, leads to…weird hair shapes. Hair that is slept on while damp will take on the shape it has dried in. Long hair will kinda weigh itself down and lie flat because, well, because of gravity. Shorter hair can maintain all kinds of interesting sculptural shapes for hours on end.
“You will save lots of money.” This will be positively true - eventually. Her theory here seemed to involve less shampoo, conditioner and styling products. This may have been failing to take into account the fact that manufacturers have created a whole different set of styling products for the new, shorter ‘do, that you simply must invest in. In regards to cleaning, let’s refer back to the above paragraph. Your hair will demand to be washed more often. “But wait, won’t it take way less shampoo?” you ask. Well it might, but that treacherous brain also may forget to tell your hands that you have less hair. So invariably, you'll pour enough for the missing length to be suitably clean, then realize your error. This leaves two rather unappealing options. You could simply rinse most of it down the drain. But this feels wasteful (never mind that the shower is running the entire time you're considering your options). That leaves the second option: trying to coax some of the excess back into the bottle. Shampoo makers are wise to this idea, so they manufacture the bottles with tiny openings, making it near impossible to add, or in this case, return, anything to the bottle. So by using a combination of gravity, negative pressure and holding your mouth just right, you might attempt to return the superfluous portion to the bottle. Only to wash it all down the drain.
“You will feel so good after you donate it” This was a tough one. People will ask if you donated it. You will let a few people know that you had done so. Suddenly, people will be canonizing you and your glorious sacrifice. They might explain why they could never manage such a feat, as though you've solved the mysteries of the universe or negotiated world peace, rather than simply washed, brushed and styled some extra hair for a while. You will know you merely allowed your hair to do what hair does " grow. All this praise can be a little embarrassing and you will begin to wonder if you should tell people. Then it will start to happen. A few of them confide what such a gift, once meant (or would have meant) to someone close to them. They will tell you how that person had fought a disease and the outcome. Or tell you about their own fight. And you will feel simultaneously very proud and very small. Proud that such a gift could have such an impact. And small in the face of those who had battled those diseases…and won…or lost. And you will think “It may be time to start growing my hair again…” © 2016 ShannonAuthor's Note
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Added on July 1, 2016Last Updated on July 5, 2016 Author
ShannonCanadaAboutI like to explore the world through the human experience, at once both varied and singular. Reading, writing and meeting people makes one's world larger. I enjoy connecting with people, learning.. more..Writing
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