Shiny New Red Bicycle

For those who see the humor in the everyday.

We set out to buy my husband a new bicycle, my son and I.  In his preschool enthusiasm, he knows one thing: it must be red.  I know the size required and that my husband’s birthday is tomorrow; he will be truly surprised, as I have had to save for months for this purpose. We will leave it in our neighbors home until morning, then surprise him with it at breakfast.  It is the first time I have managed such a surprise.

I am relived, upon arriving at the big box store, that one the appropriate bikes in my price range is red.  My little boy is thrilled that his dad’s new bike will match his own.  I pay for the purchase and take it to the parking lot.  Where my plan very rapidly begins to fall apart.

I try to put the bike across the back seat to no avail. No matter which angle I try and how I move the handle bars, it is not even close. Perhaps I can somehow prop it in the front?  I am unable to even get the whole bike in the front, as the angles on the bicycle and the angles on the door prove to be completely incompatible. Aha!  The back seat folds down into the trunk.  Surely I have room for one adult sized bike in the trunk and back set combined!  No such luck.

I am rapidly running out of ideas and my son is rapidly running out of patience.  I have no rope and worry that I will not be able to secure the bike to my car securely enough to manage to get up the large hill that run through the city and looms between where I am now and where I need to be, using the bungee cords.  I finally settle on going back into the store to call my father in law to bring his van.

During the wait, I coach my son on what a surprise means, how it is different from lying and how much dad will like his surprise in the morning. My father in law comes to my rescue and the bike is safely transported to my home and tucked away in my neighbors front room.  My husband is already home. 

My son, very keen on keeping our surprise very confidently tells his father: “Dad, we didn’t buy you a bike today”!

Author's Note

A few of my oldest Café friends have commented recently about this, my very first story in 20 years.

Someone wisely pointed out how humorous my brief foray into this topic was in my last piece. So I wrote this one in response.

Reviews

[Woody]

fun little write, S. I like the description of the struggle to ft the bike in the car. that's funny. you managed to create a clear picture in the reader's mind.
the last line's the cherry on the cake. children can come up with the most astounding sentences.
no suggestions for improvement except check your tenses. you chose to tell the story in the present tense but at times lapsed iinto the past.
"no matter which angle I tried........"
"I coached my son"
this sometimes happens to me when I choose the present tense.

[Shannon]

Thank you so much for the read. And the feedback. Funny thing is, this is somethings I often catch in other people's writings! I will make changes once I am on a desk top!

[Stan Lee]

Great little story SMi. You certainly have a unique writing style. I think all of us have had that "Oh no! The car's not big enough moment" - Very enjoyable! :)

[Shannon]

It came out very formal sounding and I went with it. I have not idea why, as it is a true story and I was maybe 22 or 23 and anything but formal. Thank you!

[Inject Positivity]

haha.... this was brilliant... awwww!! this was lovely mam.... the way it started and the way it ended, amazing.... i never ever thought that this would end in such a way.... this was happens, we plan to give surprise to someone and then suddenly what we fear, the surprise reveals before the right time.... awesome work.... loved it, you made my morning smily....

[Shannon]

Thank you, I made a vague reference in my Aphantasia piece to always trying to put stuff in cars that won't fit, and someone said it funny. I decided to write one up. This really happened!

[Inject Positivity]

you did amazingly well... i loved it... intensity through out the story and ended with brilliance....