This reminds me a lot of like ancient civilizations like Rome or something like that. I'm not really sure why, but the picture I get from this is a man coming back to his home (obviously dead) on a platform covered in a white cloth with his armor still on. I think it's really cool, even though it's a sad subject. I like how you ended the poem with a question. It means that the reader can image how the story will end or a possibility for a sequel poem. Great job :)
The world that believe in the eye for the eye world. We will all end-up dead. Someone must stop fighting and seek peace. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote
war is so rough on those left behind when a warrior has fallen...and we try to justify it by saying ---as dylan said "you don't count the dead when God is on your side"
but in the same song he said "if God really is on our side, he will stop the next war"
but only we can do that...we need peace and love.
not catastrophe, hate and grieving....
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Totally agree with what you're saying, sire! I wanted to end the poem by putting a rhetorical questi.. read moreTotally agree with what you're saying, sire! I wanted to end the poem by putting a rhetorical question, "When shall the young man's thirst quench?" There is no end to his thirst because some day, in his place, there'd be some other young man grieving for his father's loss, if he's avenge his revenge! There is no gain if we embrace war, even if we win!
There will always be mourning, grievance and hatred!
Very well written piece this one... You have described the pain of families that suffer.... the families of soldiers never want revenge... they want justice and respect.... search Sourabh Kalia... his father is still crying for justice for the brutality shown to his son's body......
This reminds me a lot of like ancient civilizations like Rome or something like that. I'm not really sure why, but the picture I get from this is a man coming back to his home (obviously dead) on a platform covered in a white cloth with his armor still on. I think it's really cool, even though it's a sad subject. I like how you ended the poem with a question. It means that the reader can image how the story will end or a possibility for a sequel poem. Great job :)
A girl with a generous and dwindling soul, attempting to speak my heart out to the world. I'm enamoured by people and their behavior and often dedicate my poems and articles to them.
I'm seventeen ye.. more..