THE WAIT

POEM

  Slight, though, ominous,

self-conscious, motions

reluctant  flinches, restrained

implosions, as the shuttle

engine  expends a vast,

hovering noise, stomach

churns, grasping the seat

handles to exhale breath, to

clumsily re-poise, reticent  

though relieved, to finally

abandon land, to leave

following several denigrating,

drawn out, intensive, disturbed,

violations, inflating, heady

tensions, conflating scepticism,

senses over-driven with each

sneeze, shuffle & page turning

crumple, every minute

merged into, brutal

compounding complexities,

second by second

            verged on  crucial,

                               hampering perplexities...

                                        then at last,

                            TAKE OFF!

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

feedback would be most welcome

Reviews

[Fabian G. Franklin]

This was wonderful. It describes the varied emotions one might feel on a first flight; or ANY flight for that matter. My brother is a pilot. He's also an ex Ranger paratrooper who used to skydive but he has a fear of heights. He gets vertigo on a high ladder or in a balcony. It's crazy. But flying doesn't bother him or skydiving...

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Ah, I've finally found a way to reply, infact I went ahead and sent you a message, I so enjoyed your great review, with much thanks

[John Alexander McFadyen]

I had not looked at the picture so read through this and felt the build up of tension and when I got to lift off was left wodering. When I looked at the picture it all fell nicely into place. I have never read of this experience that most of us have experienced so well set out. Really good.

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Thanks ever so much John

[Monster ^.^]

Without the picture there, and Mr. Pax's review, and the tags, I wouldn't have been able to get what this was about... rather than the fact that the lines were either synonymous and or defining each other...

and then when I knew... I was like... Oh, S**t. Why didn't I get that!?!?! and then I reread it. And yeah, I imagined myself grasping on the airplane seats for my life.

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Thank you my friend, reading your thoughts are most useful, I guess this is a possibly exaggerated, observation piece, exposing the disgruntlement of a vulnerable airline passanger prior to lifitng off, althoug I have the specified where any of the events occured ( eg: in the departure lounge)....cheers

[SHEEMA HUQ]

I meant; although I have NOT specified....just for clarity!

[Pax]

wow.... very creative!
~ i sense or i feel like I'm on the pilot's seat preparing the engine to take off...also i felt the fear...like the thoughts clouding your senses...that's great!... the thoughts you conveyed my friend, has some great intensity... the word choices in fact brings a edge into your poetry.... Great job!

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Dear Pax, thanks so much, yes I think that this is an edgy piece indeed, based on pure intensity of emotions, I'm grateful for you input, as ever

[Pax]

your most welcome my friend...