Survivor Story 3

(Submitted January 18, 2019)

So when I was 14, there was this 17 year old guy at my towns highschool that I started talking with. It was going really great. You know the deal, older guy makes the younger girl feel loved and wanted and she completely falls for him and they're "in love". And I thought we were. I told him I wanted to wait to have sex and I lied to him about being a virgin because I was ashamed of losing my virginity so early. One night, I snuck out of my house and he picked me up around midnight. I had a bad feeling in my guy about what was going to happen but I pushed it aside because I was "in love" and thought to myself "he loves me, nothing's gonna happen". We go to his house where he lived with his parents. He brought out some vodka from the kitchen and he mixed it in a Monster energy drink for me. Since I had never had more than a sip of my dad's beer, (which was the most disgusting thing by the way) I got pretty drunk in a very short time.


I don't remember anything more than snapshots of faint memories of that night. I do however remember him bringing out handcuffs and rope and a bunch of other sex toys I had never even heard of. He handcuffed me to his headboard and tied my feet to the bed posts. He said "it's not gonna hurt, I promise I'll be gentle". I remember very vividly saying no, but he continued. After he ended up getting what he wanted, he drove me home, dropped me off a couple houses down and told me he would see me later. I was too buzzed to go into my window quietly so I just walked in the back door and went to my room to pass out. A few weeks pass and I hear nothing from him, and being during the summer time I didn't see him at the school. All of the sudden I start getting sick in the morning when I get up to take a shower. My appetite was never really huge at night so I just dry heaved over the toilet. I didn't know what was wrong with me. My mom decided to take me to my doctor and start birth control. "Just in case anything ever happens" she said. We went to the doctor and they did an STD and pregnancy test just to make sure I was okay to get the depo injection that day.


Well, the nurse came back in and told me I was pregnant. My mom was furious, told me I had to get an abortion and gave me a list of reasons why. I believed her, I was young a naive and I didn't know what to do with a baby. So at 13 weeks and 4 days, I went to planned parenthood and had a surgical abortion...it was painful, and I cried the whole time. But I think the worst part about this whole story wasn't that I was raped, wasn't that my mom convinced me to not have my child, it was the pain I felt in my heart when I told the guy I was pregnant and he called me a liar in front of all my friends. I slapped him across the face and walked away with silence and tears on my cheeks. I can't believe I just wrote this whole thing, but since I did, I think that means I'm finally healing...

- Anonymous