virus

dark cynical

drip. drop,drip,drop

you think it worked? they gave their blood?

they surrendered to the thought of fear

a virus so strong it cant appear

they cant see and they cant hear

but they trust in their seer

follow me sheep, follow me deep

ill lead u along the way, ill force u to betray

tempted by the green paper, burning our green maker

dont lift your head up, dont dare question

if i say you die, make no assumption

stay home stay trapped

and let me roam you earth untapped

i will fill your every home

i will fool you to feel whole

look at me peasant and look here

im your cancer so stay near

ill swallow you all ill leave nothing behind

and you'll scream for a string of hope you'll never find

Reviews

[MantaStyle]

Heyya! As to your request I'll review another poem;this one!

I like this better than the one before. Although here you're trying to not use proper grammar and slang. I think in poetry it is very weird to see "u" as a substitute for "you" that it kind of breaks my concentration in reading which is not something you want. There is also how some lines of dialogue feels a bit extra in a way that the virus is just speaking like a children's book villain with some of his intimidation lines.

Also, since I followed your request can you review my poem? ;) Hahaha.

[SANDS]

true with the "U" instead of "you", its a force of habit kinda thing :P ill be reviewing yours in a bit :)