The Dreamer

I love the Red King so The Dreamer and Heavenly King are two of my favorites out of these poems. I also love the Tweedles. ..... Not much else to say on this one....

Alone she wandered through the forest dim,

Never a thought of where to go.

The shadows glared sadistic and grim,

Bearing down on Alice below.

 

As she wandered aimlessly,

No thought, direction or plan,

She stumbled quite abruptly

On the legs of an outstretched man.

 

His appearance deceived her as youth.

His age surpassed all time.

She would never have known the truth

Had she not seen a plaque amongst the thyme.

 

The foliage it sat upon had far overgrown.

Kneeling, she pushed aside the green veil.

Foreign words were etched into the stone

Of which she could make head nor tail.

 

But fortune smiled upon her this day

For along came two men, side by side.

Identical as could be, twins were they

Matching step for step, together in stride.

 

She hailed them,"Stop!",and begged their aid

But they would not soon comply.

So with the two a deal she made

On her, she promised, they could rely.

 

They stooped by it simultaneously

To better see the worn letters.

They muttered to themselves extraneously

At which Alice noticed their fetters.

 

Escapees as herself she suspected

From the Queen's mad rage.

She soon found they had defected

From senseless war unfit to wage.

 

The words one read with soft voice.

The other stared in awe.

He stood though not his choice

As the other began to withdraw.

 

"The King," he warned, "Should never wake.

For all are but his dream."

She felt her own hands shake

For this man was God it would seem.

 

To awaken him was death and yet

She longed to touch his face.

Never before had they met

But she longed for his embrace.

 

She knelt by his regal side.

She put her palm to his cheek.

One twin nearly cried.

The other could not speak.

 

She lifted one lid with a finger

To see the color beyond.

The twins did not linger

To see if he would respond.

 

All went black in the blink of an eye.

She sobbed in the darkness deep.

Had she caused all that lived to die?

But soon her tears dried and she did sleep.

Reviews

[Snow White Queen]

I like the whole thing except the last stanza. Maybe you could try something like:

'All went black in the blink of an eye.
She sobbed into the darkness deep.
Had she caused all that lived to die?
But soon her tears did cease,
as she fell into dreamless sleep.'

It just needs to be a little more descriptive. Your pretty good with createing the right imagery. ♥