The Knight-errant or courtly fool?

The Knight-errant or courtly fool?

A Poem by Ryder Parker
"

This is a rough draft poem I had that is done in sonnet form. I will most likely continue to work on this and it may turn into something else entirely. But I suppose I'd like some criticism.

"
There is a chivalrous and errant modern Knight
Or, perhaps he is just a courtly fool with wounded chest
Phone and mind Armed with old verse that does incite
He Believes passionate lies, pain bore from heart's jest

Frigid plastic world with No dragons left to slay or noble lords to obey.
The rabble long for carnal romance, but the fool has poor timing;
His tales of pious beauty with queenly heart they exclaim cliché.
But chivalrous fool with love and respect for maidens isn't abiding.

Patient knight-errant suffers ache with scars from rendered heart.
Hopeful fool with romantic delusions but not unaware of sad realities.
He continues despite pangs, hopeful that the lord won't deliver some tart.
And the vulgus will witness his lady and shame their own commonalities.

The world needs more chivalrous romantic fools with courtly passion.
For the hopeful knight-errant with true love is never old-fashion.

© 2015 Ryder Parker


Author's Note

Ryder Parker
Lay into me!

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Reviews

I liked this. If you really want constructive criticism, I guess I would suggest maybe going through and whittling out unnecessary words so the reader doesnt lose focus on your overall theme. But only if you feel you can spare them without changing the tone of your piece ☺ For instance, "Or, perhaps he is just a courtly fool with wounded chest" could maybe be shortened to "Or, perhaps just a courtly fool with wounded chest" and so on. But I wouldn't go so far as to say it's imperative you do so. Sonnets are tricky to write. You did a great job ☺

Posted 9 Years Ago



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Added on November 3, 2015
Last Updated on November 3, 2015
Tags: Knights, fools, romance, sonnet, poem, thoughts, witticism

Author

Ryder Parker
Ryder Parker

Norman, OK



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Becoming a better writer at a snail's pace, but I suppose everyone had their own speed. more..