Silent current

Time is a sort of river of passing events, and strong is its current;no sooner is a thing brought to sight than it is swept by and another takes its place, and this too will be swept away M.Aurelius

Just like the water polishes a cobble after cobble

and the sharpness with the stream is falling away,

all these little things get smaller all the time of the day

travelling with the silent current as they wobble

 

in my mind and the image I keep is fading in a haze

just like a very old ink written on an ancient parchment

it disentangles as a beloved but threadbare garment

it resembles to the feeling and the look upon my face

 

will I then forget how you look and who you are

or will I miss you every morning less and less

on a certain moment finding your presence even bizarre

 

will I have so many doubts that I simply only can guess

the name I gave you when I caress, it flies and is too far,

for me I hope to be wrong, this way is not at all a bless.

 

© Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere

30/04/2015

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

Beautiful photo and good words.
"in my mind and the image I keep is fading in a haze
just like a very old ink written on an ancient parchment
it disentangles as a beloved but threadbare garment
it resembles to the feeling and the look upon my face"
You create visions and thoughts with your powerful words. Thank you Rudi for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you very much, John, glad you liked this one too. :) Rudi

[Coyote Poetry]

I did and you are welcome.

[Confuser]

Rudi: This is the most beautiful poem you've written...the visual maybe having an impact, maybe thinking of Mother's Day too, but the stream, the river visual, the emotional strenghts and thoughts of drifting away somewhere we do wish or have any control over is not a blessing, it is terrible...I love the befitting title for your words portray our lives slipping away silently and so melancholy it would be. No one would wish to die that way. Have you ever read the Notebook or watched the movie? You will love it...it is the silent current you speak of and love. Also, recently I watched a documentary about patterns in rivers and streams, from satellites it can be observed. It's something scientists cannot explain: they were showing a correlation between our DNA, the way our body's work, and patterns in bodies of water. Interesting stuff and intriging. I love your poem. Thank you so very much. You are the most original and unique and talented poet I have read here. Dale

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you very much, Dale, for your kind remarks. Indeed, I've seen the Notebook movie. Very good, romantic but also a sad movie. To lose your memory, not recognizing your dear ones. Then one day a little spark and being a little better, to lose it again after some moments of hope. It's a terrible ending of one's life.
I wish you a very good Mother's day today with your children and your husband. :) Rudi

[Confuser]

You're welcome...so kind and the same to you and yours. (I unpublished the story I wrote awhile back, Family ReUnion, I saw what you meant; I did that months ago).....This one really touched my heart...also loved the Artiste...you and Anne did a beautiful collaberation.

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you, Dale. It was the first time I did this and I liked it. Normally I'm a free verse fan and mostly I write free verse, but when I do rhyme it's almost always in an Italian Sonnet form. :) Rudi

[RiverRei]

I see you using this format often (a, b, b, a) for your work. I might need to try it sometime. I usually use the format a, b, a, b, when attempting a rhyme scheme but you use this format very well and I think it would make for a good challenge for me. I love the image you have in this as well. The subtle change from a 4 line stanza to a 3 line stanza definitely keeps the reader interested in the work also, with the rhyme scheme still present and adding even more to the entire poem. Very well-written and lovely piece. Thank you for sharing it with me :)

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you, RiverRei. It's a variation on the Italian Sonnet. 4-4-3-3 (The Shakespeare sonnet is 4-4-4-2). Often there's used abba, but you can also use abab, there are some variations. :) Rudi

[sereenaoutloud]

This is what scares me most...to not remember , too loose all the memories i have made that make me me, to not recognize the faces of my loved ones, !!
Such a great write Rudi!

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you Sereena, it's the fear of many people I understand. Glad you liked it. Have a good day, Sereena. :) Rudi

[BL]

I like the opening line that is very strong and leads the reader on

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you very much, B. but I hope you like the rest too. :) Rudi

[Vishuddha]

A poignant writing portraying the possibility of the deepest heart break.
After several readings I think the last line, "for me I hope to be wrong, this way is not at all a bless" is awkward, obvious and even unnecessary.

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Maybe yes, in your eyes, but for me if flows automatically out of my head at the end of this contemplating poem. Against better knowing, I still say it, maybe to banish the obvious, a superstitious gesture at the end. :) Rudi

[anne]

i started with yours after about a month...lovely, emotional, brililant write....it touches your heart in every way...:))

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you so much, Anne. Glad you liked my poem. Have a good day. :) Rudi

[Ana B.]

A pondering, unusual write....very thoughtfull and wonderful in it's contemplation. Excellent poem Rudi :)

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you Ana, for your kind remarks. Really appreciated. :) Rudi

[thewholesoul]

beautiful piece. loved the rhyme structure too. the concept of time as an eroding current i particularly enjoyed. be well

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you for passing by, thewholesou, for reading and reviewing. Have a good day. :) Rudi

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i don't think this speaker will forget---doubts can play with our mind....but in the end, love remembers...

love the imagery in this...the silent current of the words...

and part of this reminded me of a Carlin saying.."there's a moment coming, here it comes, it's almost here, aw s**t, it's gone."

just like that.

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Yes, life is short and has a fast current. Thank you for your wise words, Jacob. :) Rudi