Aromatic spell

To spell out the obvious is often to call it in question. Eric Hoffer

Sandalwood and myrrh and rosemary,

I want to be yours forever truly

the palm of your hand, I’ll loved to caress

feels soft, like velvet or velours, I guess

 

Frankincense, patchouli and wild wild sage,

I taste the heaven, the sea and the stage

I’m calling on now, is your pretty smile

on your lips and all the waiting’s worthwhile.

 

Peppermint, camomile and hyacinth,

you’re my drug, my medicine, my niacin

between this mix of herbs and aromatics

I’ll put some love in my potion of tricks.

 

© Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere

22/11/2014

Reviews

[Klo Willow]

The introducing line to each stanza is an excellent use of repetition of structure. The array of herbs presented incite memories of smell, of which is utilized as the following lines expand on the connotation. The concluding stanza did the best to incorporate smell with its association to an aromatic love potion of trickery. Prior to this; however, the stanzas are not quite as strong, nor charming. The slight of 'I guess' carries the rhyme, but makes the intent of the poem unclear. Ambiguity in a poem depicting love is not unfit, but it doesn't seem apt in this poem.

Overall, a neat bit. I would love to see the 'potion of tricks' aspect expanded upon.

[Tasfia Islam]

Speechless..... :) Your writings are so high standard and u r rich in vocabularies....great piece of work....Well done... :)

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you Annabelle, I do my best. Glad you took time to read my scriblings. :)

Rudi

[Tasfia Islam]

you are welcome... :)

[Eleanor]

A different concept here. A sweet and interesting write :)
Though I don't know anything about herbs, I still think you used them well in your words.
Thank you.

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you, Isha, glad you liked it. :)
Rudi

[Geo Lawrence]

its obvious, effortless flow of words here. High allusion spotted here... great write.

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you, Udeokechukwu, glad you liked it. :)
Rudi

[emmajoy]

Love this! As someone who used to grow herbs for a living .. for someone who needs to roll leaves between finger tips so a scent stays with me.. i find this poem not only sweetly put but memorable. The sense of smell you've accentuated here is more than enticing on a dull day when rain's washed away the perfume of everything but wet earth... tho that's wonderful too - ahhhh!

' Frankinense, patchouli and wild wild sage,' = a perfect Sunday sweet-smelling feast!

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

I'm so glad, Emmajoy that I could make you day smell good. Thank you for taking time to read my scribblings. :à

Rudi

[emmajoy]

my pleasure

[Noor.92]

Nice use of herbs..it seems you know botany quite well..;-) well written piece..!

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you, Noor, I had the idea after reading a story about witches and vampires. Witches are familiar with herbs and so and when I had read the beautiful names of this herbs and aromatics I knew I had to mingle them in a potion and made a poem about them. :)
Rudi

[Noor.92]

Really creative..:-)

[Laura Lynn]

pretty, we should have these herbs, Ricola is a great blend of herbs too,

this is excellent beyond a shadow of a doubt, rhythmic and incredibly aware of sound, or the effects of sounds be that as it may, all things to be enjoyed in this lifetime as a gift and freedom for many,

thank you,

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you Laura. Glad you enjoyed it, makes my day good. :)

Rudi

[Sanjh]

It's great, a refreshing write...
Thank you for sharing...:)

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you Sanjh, for your kind remarks. It makes me happy. :)
Rudi

[MomzillaNC]

Quite an incantations you'e spun…

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Got the idea while reading a story about witches and vampires. :)
Rudi

[MomzillaNC]

Ya got a good idea!

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thanks, my pleasure.

[MomzillaNC]

YVW :D