Where is my soul

What is a soul? It's like electricity - we don't really know what it is, but it's a force that can light a room. Ray Charles

Where then, can I find my soul?

Is it indissolubly connected with my life

or does it swim with my blood

in the flood through my veins?

 

What if I cut myself and lose a part?

 

Or do I have to search inside my head

in the sparkles between the synapses

along the axons and the dendrites?

 

And if I forget, one day

shall my soul also disappear?

 

Will I dissect my heart

slice pieces of it

watch them with a magnifying glass

if I can see all those feelings,

or if my joy is baked in the wall of it,

if I hear it on the beat all the tears and the sorrow?

 

What if my heart suddenly stops,

is this also the end of my soul?

 

Just to be sure I’ll go somewhat deeper

till I meet the smallest cell and then still a bit further,

maybe I see in my genes

why I’m afraid of death,

and frightened to live fully my life?

 

Can I read in my amino acids

What brings the day of tomorrow?

 

I’ve still so many ways to go,

so much to travel, stand still for a while,

so many questions which haunt my mind

why am I born in this body

why am I thinking this?

 

© Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere

18/04/2015

Reviews

[Nolo Segundo]

I just 'discovered' this-- I quite like its tone, and some of the lines work very well: '...joy...baked.. in the wall', 'heart stops.. end of my soul'. And you posit a universal question that seems to afflict many: why do people fear both death and life?
I think I sense a certain hesitancy in your lines-- perhaps because English is your 2nd language (though you are more fluent than most native speakers). And I think it might have been interesting to start the poem with the last two lines, but maybe I'm wrong.
As a young man 45 years ago I 'experienced' my soul when I almost drowned and had what 's come to be known as an NDE, or near-death experience. (The curious thing is that the soul --when it's conscious of itself, exists in the moment, without beginning or end-- just as our 'mortal' consciousness does-- we can't remember being born so it seems like we've always been alive. Of course, we 'know' we're going to die, but who really believes that?

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you for this review and your thought about 'the soul'. Means a great deal to me. :) Rudi

[Geo Lawrence]

hmmm...philosophical. you have feed my thoughts and mandated me awaken pondering!!!

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you very much, Udeokechukwu. :) Rudi

[Confuser]

Rudi: What another fabulous poem. Great questioning. We all came from stardust, or so I hear and that we exist with all the solar systems, billions and millions of other planets like ours is phenomenal; so the soul, the quote from R.C. is profound, like your questions. I like the way you write about the smallest cells, like a leptone, searching for what we cannot see. It just is. Beautiful, and intriguing. Dale

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you, Dale, for your kind remarks. Glad you liked this poem too. Have a good day, my friend. :) Rudi

[Confuser]

You're welcome; my pleasure, truly remarkable!

[sereenaoutloud]

This is a fantastic piece that i think most of us ask !! The Imagery you create of looking deeper into yourself is brilliant. Also love the last line "why am i thinking this?" its a perfect ending a question with a question and of course it starts the thinking over again.
Great write :)

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you, Sereena. Glad you liked this poem too. Indeed, it's a question most of us ask at some point. Is there a thing, a sort of energy in us, a being that survives the death? I'm not in a hurry to experience it, I like living, but I know when the time is there I surely will be very curious. Thanks for the nice remarks. :) Rudi

[sereenaoutloud]

yes i agree, i am not in a hurry to experience it either ... lol but yes curious as to what it truly is!!

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

indeed, :)

[Ana B.]

A fantastic piece of sheer beauty and wisdom. I absolutely love the idea and the beautiful construction. A masterpiece dear Rudi :)

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you so much, Ana. I'm glad I can touch people with my thoughts. I think it's also a subjectread moreThank you so much, Ana. I'm glad I can touch people with my thoughts. I think it's also a subject
that keeps people awake. Because we are born in this body of ours, we have to die...but is that the end? Glad you liked it. :) Rudi

[John McCabe]

A very good piece of work, Rudi. I have to admit, I never thought I was keen on poetry, but having read yours and James' today, I will be sure not to be such a philistine, ha.

Your contemplative and philosophical pondering on the existentialism of life in the poem was really rather profound. In addition, I especially like your use of scientific words, and as a former student of psychology, I must say that it resonated with me quite a bit!

Keep up your good work.

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thank you, John, I'm glad you like it. Being a father of a civil engineer, a bio-engineer and a physician, I hear a lot of scientific talk at the dinner table. I, myself, I am an accountant, so the metaphysical aspect is a bit lost in that world. But there's also another person living in me who knows that you can't answer all the questions with science. As Shakespeare said: there are more things in heaven and earth... Thank you for your review. :) Rudi

[....................]

Such a creative pondering of the soul: its consistency and purpose. I wonder how many sit and wonder the same thing? I have... hundreds of times. Some believe it belongs to God and we simply borrow it; others believe the soul starts it's journey and lives for centuries, hopping out of the dying and into the newborn; others believe it is nothing, and that once we are gone, it (whatever it is) goes too. But, whatever it is or isn't, I know this, we have a physical state, a mental state and then that other state which we can never figure out. Perhaps it's a combination of the mental and physical... I love delving into these questions and you have cause me to pause and think this afternoon, Rudi, and now I must pour some tea and think a while longer.

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

This is a wonderful review, FT. I like it when I can let people start thinking about the subjects of my poem. I think every human being at some point must realise that there's more than just our physical state. From where does it come, to where does it go? What about the white tunnel or light some people who came back from the death talk about, is that our soul who's travelling further. Some people have seen an apparition of a sort of ghost at the same moment a relative or a friend died. Was that a dream or was it his soul saying goodbye? It all comes on the same question: Is there something after death? Thank you for thinking with me. :) Rudi

[Jamestown]

Really nice piece of work, very thought provoking!
You raise several questions that are asked by several
young people adults also but young people have vast
imaginations as you know:) I enjoyed the read, thanks for
sharing and b-blessed!

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Thanks, James, glad if I can make people think about the things I write. Have a good day. :) Rudi