Dark Pleasure

part of the late night poetry with Rossen collection

           Her crippling stare is like a warning

                         The deep circles swirl around those

                                Dark still  eyes

                         She eliminates souls from close encounters

                 Somehow I stand within her electric blue mist

           Moonlight  slips through the half open blinds

            Her naked goth pail body, half in soft shadow

              lust pulls my focus out of the blur

              Sending blood to the awaiting member

                 The soft gleam of light from

                 the side of her breast

          
                         Taunting my will...
       

       Both frozen still within this cold empty space

Without a word... I Undress...

With a sharp stare she delivers her warning

Some time passes

Speechless... Ive been muted

I lay on my back on the hardwood floor

Close my eyes

Holding my breath... I wait to see what will...

Soft stroking finger tips,

Across my eyelids

I can feel her exhale... absent of warmth

Wet darting feeling on the nape of my throat

My heart is heaving not beating

My hands rest... open palms, knuckles touching the floor..

She is.. devouring me...

Author's Note

who is she to you?

Reviews

[Rory CJ Frankson]

************************************************************* All Stars *****************************

SMOKIN... as I was reading I was really impressed with the staging of this piece Ros, it holds areas of real mistique, intrugue and sultry suspence.
I like what PJ mention about the Vampirish feel and it being suptle and not outwardly stated. To mention in messaging that there is like a suspension between some of these phrases, that leave us rather breathless. Erotic, without going over the top and I like that. Over all, I would have to say this is a great write and I think you have a niche here that suits your writing style... this piece is delicious.
Right On / Write On!
Romon in Review

[Linear]

Well written, and a cool sensuallity flows throughout, Who is she to me? she is the ice wind on naked skin, the taunting rebuff, that says just dare, the red sweet lips of desire devouring all, the dregs of the wine bottle forever keeping me off balance, she is love, lust and heartfelt desire.

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

I like the rewrite, you added some additional images and they give a slightly different feel to the poem.

[DreyaArt]

wow, that s good. im new to this whole "review" thing. So all I can say is the imagery is breathtaking. Thank you for writing this.

[Robin]

my ex ...

[Narnie]

The intensity is very alluring. The classical layout of the language certainly adds to it - don't we all do that when the moment insists? I was concerned about 'fallowed'? And it slightly distracted me but the poem is wonderful. And a huge high five for exploring this genre. :)

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

Romanitc in the dark way and very sensual .. She sounds a bit like a black widow spider devouring her mate, though i think he is enjoying it .. love these lines...

"The deep circles swirl around those

Dark still eyes

She eliminates souls from close encounters

---Somehow I stand within her electric blue mist---

Moonlight slips through the half open blinds

Her bare necked goth white body half in shadow

pulls my focus out of the blue"

Love the use of color electrified.

Chloe

A Succubus? An illusion? Who is this goth pale lady who devours ?

[Jim Parson]

Beautifully done, full of dark mystery and intensity! You've put us there and my heart beats in rhythm. Really well done!

[John Jackson (El Juero)]

'Electric blue mist' Great wordage. Tasteful erotica leaves plenty for the reader's imagination, and you have done that here. Nice imagery.

[pheasant]

A mysteriously dark and provocative encounter which leaves you aguess
I for one would likely back down from such a devouress