Emptyness within,

My Mum is dying, I never really had a relationship with her for years. Due to her mental health problem, She doesn't want to see me, But she sees........ my sister this hurts me real bad. I don't know

My Mum is dying, sad though its true I really never had a relationship with her since the 1988.
Due to her mental health problem she pushed me away.
Time and time again. She doesn't want to see me,but she sees
my sister Hazel and she takes her out shopping.
and it hurts real bad.
I don't know how i will handle it when she dies,
She miss treated me when I WAS YOUNGER UP UNTIL I WAS A TEENAGER.
She still singled me out.
Why I do not know all I do know I still hurt with these feelings of rejection..
I think to myself why did you give birth to me.
Why do you hate me that much,?..............
The terrible torment that i went though as a child, nowadays's would be unforgivable.
I don't understand Why, I was left to rot in a pot with all that abuse. Surly some-one new the pain that I suffered as a child. Like my Uncle for one thing him being high up in rank in the police force he turned a blind eye to me being hurt by my mother.
Just because it was family doen't make it right.
I wanted to sue the authorities for what happened to me...

But I didn't want to put my Dad through anymore pain....

He worked so hard for us all, and kept a roof clothes and food for years.
I wrote 4 poems one good one about my dad.
Dad you are my best friend.....
Forgotten......
Rejection.........
I miss you Mum..... that helped me to deal with a lot of pain. It was definably good to get it off my chest and certainly it has helped others to through their pain....  I will continue to write poetry a great way of releasing  brokenness ....I do hope that this message can help others........ THROUGH MY BROKENNESS i HAVE LEARNED TO LET GO...... AND TRUST GOD FOR MY FUTURE.....May God richly bless you all on Writers Cafe.......

torment