Alone

A poem about how I feel now that I am no longer at school and with those I consider friends.

Alone.

All alone at home,

With nothing to do.

While all the time

I think about you.

At school,

You're a fool,

Crazy and fun.

But I always wonder;

Will it end?

Or will you still,

After all this time,

Stay my friend.

My best friend.

Author's Note

If there is anything you think can be improved, please tell me.

Reviews

[dw817]

⊰ℛℛ⊱
Sometimes, Rose, sometimes - a fool for a friend is the best friend of all. They are non-judgmental, they don't ridicule you for the way you are, or look too deeply at others' destinations nor their ulterior intentions.

And when they play the fool, that is just their way of whistling in the dark. For no-one wants to be alone. No-one.

As I have oft written in my profile, I would rather be a fool than a nobody, and I've had years of experience in both.

Nicely written and superbly succinct.

[Rose]

Thank you very much, and my friend is a fool, yet crazy as well, but that's just who she is and she always makes me smile whenever I'm down.

[dw817]

I think I do that a bit with Chris. He's so - SERIOUS - all the time. And me, I'm the opposite. I try and think of life as one big adventure and try to find the fun in everything. :)

[Rose]

Yeah, I know what you mean

[Lovecraft]

Nice poem, although you should have made the lines a bit longer, though a good poem concerning the nature of true friendship.

Overall, everybody could relate to this and many would wish to have friends like these. ;)

[Urja Gokani]

amazingly written keep it up !!

[Rose]

Thank you, I will do.

[Zoomout]

I love this simple beautiful one

[Rose]

Thank you :)

[Sami Khalil]

A sad and lonely feeling indeed. A nice poem...:)

[Rose]

Thank you very much.

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:)

[zainul]

I understand the your feeling when you are alone.
Thanks for sharing.

[Rose]

Welcomes and I'm glad people understand my feelings.

[zainul]

:)

[revalatia]

its whats inside you.. just express it.. !!.. to hell with improvements ;)

[Rose]

Thanks.

[revalatia]

nice.. I wonder the same thing sometimes ;)

[Rose]

It's good that people can relate to this.

[Aethereal]

This is a very sweet poem, but it would flow better if you applied exact meter to each line. As an example of what I mean, I wrote your first four lines in 5-5-5-5 meter. All the accents match: You may have this verse as a gift to keep as your own. Following meter improves the flow of a poem. Look in the dictionary to find where the accents fall within each word:

Here alone at home,
all I want to do,
is spend all my time
contemplating you.

[Rose]

Thanks very much, but I feel fine with the way I have written it, as I am not that very good at writing poems. However, I appreciate the suggestions and help.

[Aethereal]

It just flows and sings better if you follow meter, but if you're just trying to get a point across, then anything goes. You did get your point across. You don't really need to rhyme if you follow meter.

[Rose]

I understand, thanks for the help.

[Twilight_Starlight]

That is so sweet sis

[Rose]

Thanks sis.