1- Gwen- School

Gwen meets Heidi... How ironic...

     The frost of the early morning clings to my window and as I rub it away to see, its chill clings to me. I decide I should probably get ready for school now. I have an hour, but still it's always nice to be early.
     I hardly slept last night. Well, I hardly ever get a good nights sleep, but last night was different. I dreamt, about what I can't remember for the life of me, but it made my stomach twist and my thoughts to go back to the dark corner I try to keep closed off. 

I step away from my window and walk towards the door but something stops me. A shiver ran down my spine like someone had just "walked on my grave". A flash, a memory from my dream, runs across my eyes. A face. A girl. Who? I had never seen her before. The second I tried to remember more of her the image vanished. 

Disturbed, I slowly walked down the stairs for breakfast. Pancakes! What a great start to a new school year. 

I wolf them down as if my life depended on it and when Mom wasn't looking I slip a couple granola bars into my bag. I hated being hungry and school lunches always sucked. 

I ran upstairs for a well needed shower and got the rest of the way ready, straightening my hair, doing my make-up, and you know, the works.  

I grabbed my bag, weighed down with books, and ran out to my car. It maybe surprising to some that I'm a "Freshee" with a car but, hey what can I say, I was held back. Anyway. The drive to school was rather boring 'cause my favorite radio station of all time didn't reach my expectations and I had left my book on tape at home. Sadly. 

Parking was a pain. All the parents were waiting longer than normal to watch their "little babies" go into the school. Such an annoyance. I ended up parking at the back of the lot and walking. 

The hallway was extremely crowded and I had to shove my way to my locker, 74. I threw my coat in and slapped on my lock.

        On to biology I sighed, sliding into the room just as the bell was ringing. I have always hated science. The teacher, Mr. Dastel began his lecture the second we all sat down. What a bore.

He assigned us new seats and he sat me by the window. I guess I could zone out here. He sat a girl named Heidi next to me. She was new.

I looked her over. Her hair was blond and generally strait, with small curls at the ends. No make-up. Blue eyes. honestly she looked like she had just rolled out of bed. Her bag was thrown next to her and she sat, slumped, in her chair. She looked like she might just fall asleep. She is nothing like me. 

She is just here.

Author's Note

Thoughts?

Reviews

[AWickedMoon]

I feel like these lines could use some reworking
"I ran upstairs for a needed shower and got the rest of the way ready. Straightening my hair, make-up, and you know the works."

I think you ment sighed?
"On to biology. I signed."

I hope im not being to bold with this one but this is my suggestion for the line
"On to biology. I signed. I have always hated science. I slipped into the room just as the bell was ringing. The teacher, Mr. Dastel, began his lecture the second we all sat down. What a bore.

"On to biology I sighed, sliding into the room just as the bell was ringing. I have always hated science. The teacher, Mr. Dastel began his lecture the second we all sat down. What a bore."

(but thats just me so feel free to completely ignore it)

Other than that I think it is a wonderful start to your story. :)

[Harley Rose]

Thank you and this is very helpful

[Darkening Shadow]

Good first chapter!! But you need to use comma's to space out your sentences.

[Harley Rose]

Thank you

[Wingless Fallen Angel]

first paragraph, 'it's' should be its. It's is a conjunction of 'it' and 'is'. That's the only one I spotted, buddy! :)

[Wingless Fallen Angel]

Shoot, in the first sentence. Sorry, forgot to mention that part in my review.

[Harley Rose]

Thanks!

[Wingless Fallen Angel]

Yuppers!

[Be myself!]

Awesome. Some misspellings but not to shabby

[Harley Rose]

Could you tell me whats spelled wrong... my spelling obviously isn't the best but I can't really tell until someone points it out... Thank you.

[Be myself!]

I can't find them lol. Its probably not very noticable. Don't worry about it. lol