Jump Then Fall

This is just a One-Shot/Short Story I wrote to humor people. I used 'Jump Then Fall' by Taylor Swift for insperation. No copywrite intended.

Jump Then Fall

 

I walked into work dreading life. “Who works at a foreign toilet paper store, called WipeMart?” This is what I think every day. If you asked yourself these questions, how would you respond? Me? I would tell myself, “You are one jacked up retard, Molly!”

        Oh, by the way, you may want to know that my name is Molly. My full name is Emolly Elizabeth Cantre. I go to Letter High school in the mystical world of Dorksville. Yupp, isn’t my life wonderful? I say that sarcastically. I have a bad sense of humor, just to let you know.

        While I was talking to myself, just like every retard would, I run into Ian. He is the hottest guy in Dorksville. He looks like a taller Justin Beaver! His voice is totally sexy and low and he has a great smile. He also makes straight C’s (My magical hero!). “Sorry Smolly. I MEANT MOLLY!” He says before running off. He is so dreamy! He puts me in heaven.

        I start to stock toilet paper in aisle 11, the scented toilet paper aisle. God forbid there be regular toilet paper in this store. Sarcasm alert! Anyway, I was on the top of a ladder when I hear this interesting noise. I run down the ladder, more like jump, and fall onto the ground. I get up and there is Ian, basically laughing to death. “What the heck is your problem?” I almost yell, astonished. “I was walking and then I looked at the label on one of the packages of toilet paper. I couldn’t help but laugh hysterically. It says ‘It will make you smell better after you wipe.’ That is seriously perverted!” He just stares at me and then I crack up. We laugh together for almost 10 minutes. Point one on the Ian scale for Mol-Lay!

        We continued our sophisticated conversation about (turns white in attempt of trying to say this without laughing) . . . TOILET PAPER!!!  And at the last moment, I crack a joke. Ian stares and then makes and excuse to leave. Point taken, very harsh IAN!

        Anyway, the point is, when you jump up the ladder, be prepared to fall a few feet.

Written by RawrRoni

Author's Note

Sorry, but it is pretty short. Excuse the grammer problems please!

Reviews

[Theo]

This story is like a stream of conscious. Your youth clearly shows through your energetic writing style and ample use of the caps lock. The effects of a boy on a girl show through your writing and these will be good for your writing later in life. This type of writing seems to disappear after we grow up a little so it's nice to read this refreshing bit of young fiction.