Clever, very clever! Now I know where all those lost hours are, and I thought I was just sitting and thinking of grand, new themes for my next poem....lol
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Lol! My grand themes always end up being silly... :) Thanks, Sheila!
This was great... Whimsical, clever, and well done in terms of form and style. I think your rhyme was smooth and unforced, and your language was fantastic. Of course, the final stanza was the cherry on top of the sundae; you show the depth of your wit here. Well done!
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Thank you, Sarah. As usual, I find Life to be pretty funny...
This is a classic Rita - if I read this to my sister's kids, her boys would take turns Im sure (when they thought no one was watching) looking in her hoover for the time that had been sucked up. *coughs* - blooming dust is *cough* everywhere - my hoover is a dirty b*****d!
LOL
X
Lol awesome! A poem to brighten up the day for sure, put a smile on my face! Sometimes it does feel like time flies, from now on my vacuum is to Blame! Dirty b*****d! Haha
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
LOL! "Dirty b*****d" - yes, that's just what he is! Thanks, Brittney!
11 Years Ago
Can I just have a wee LOL with you on that one Rita - LOL LOL - brilliant review Brittney
You have got the stuff, Rita! I swear, I know before click on one of your pieces, I am gonna love it. You make me laugh at least once a day. Most of the time it is more than that! Ha! Angi~
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Angi, that is the best compliment - It makes me so happy to give a smile or a laugh! :) Thank you!
Time is gone but yes thoughts still swirl into the wind, settling on a quiet rock ledge narrow, cupped in a eddy,a space perfect for time.
Smile , Cliff...
Time funny thing this highway of collective conciseness.no speed limit, what is speed without time ?
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Time is indeed a mystery that we all want as a friend... Thank you for reading, Lee!
This magnificent poem of yours inspired me to rewrite it as a gift poem which you my keep as your own since I used most of your ideas to created it. It's in /0/0/0 six syllable meter with overlapping rhyme: I love challenges such as this!
Vacuumed Time
My new vacuum cleaner
has far too much power
making it much meaner
as it sucks each hour.
They're mixed with my rug's grime.
I'll search niches in it
till I gain my lost time,
every ticking tidbit.
It would be good to know,
as a great maneuver,
where my time seems to flow
deep inside a Hoover.
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