Homophoneophobia

It's my sickness...

Welcome, grammar students

and word nerds everywhere

today’s rant is on homophones ~

come, pull up a chair.

 

There is a different meaning

between words like wear and where;

don’t even get me started on

the trio: their/there/they’re

 

They are not interchangeable,

the words to, too and two

and you should always double check

using do, or due, or dew

 

Is it altar; maybe alter;

is the bread of rye or wry?

What do I shout to purchase stocks,

buy, or by, or bye?

 

An apostrophe in “it’s”

means “it  is”;  not possessive.

“Its” without shows ownership

(I know, I am obsessive!)

 

Your and you’re ~ another pair

with usage gone bizarre;

“your” means that you own it,

“you’re” is just “you  are”

 

If Mom gives you permission,

then you say you are allowed;

“aloud” means that you’re speaking ~

as in saying it out loud

 

There are so many homophones,

we could be (bee) here (hear) all night (knight).

Just promise you’ll be careful

when you sit down to write (right?)

 

 

Author's Note

The pet peeve ravings of a lunatic... nothing to see here... ;)

Reviews

[redflutterby]

Lol....sometimes I miss the your/you're one usually because I'm writing to fast. And my damn phone has auto spell so it messes with me occasionally. ;-)

Great write...perfect poem for your students to read.

[Rita L. Sev]

Auto spell is the bane of my existence! When I do happen to post an error, it is often because I did not double-check before hitting "send". Ha! Thanks, Red!

[redflutterby]

I hate it.... Always trying to finish things wrong. Lol... Yes double checking is the answer. ;-). You're welcome.

[David Scott]

I love homophones! I screw em up all the time... Not because I don't know better, but because I don't pay attention. We must think alike. One of the first poems I posted here was a play on homophones.
Thank you for "peeving" out this poem. It was fun!

[Rita L. Sev]

Ha! I rant a lot here :) Thanks, David!

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Again, you having me rolling in the proverbial asiles with this one. Their is a method to you're maddness ;) I have to agree whole-heartedly with this one, because one of my pet peeves is the improper use of grammar. Sometimes I have a hard time reading/reviewing work where there is more than one improper use of a word, because it seems as though the writer has not taken the time to really polish their work, so why should I take the time to give my opinions? We can all make a mistake here and there, done in haste most of the time, but there is no excuse for writing riddled with improper grammar. Very clever and insanely well written.

[Rita L. Sev]

Ha! Thank you again, Sarah. Yes, the homophone thing is clearly not a choice of creative rebellion. I try to be patient, but when it interferes with flow or clarity, I do comment in my review - gently. I'm glad this one gave you a grin! :)

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

I do as well...and I hope beyond all hope that if I happen to, in haste, make such an error, that someone will point it out before I embarass myself for too long. :)

[Angel]

You really miss your class, don't you?? For the next couple of months, we need to proofread everything...with a MICROSCOPE!

I've always had a problem with "i before e except after c"...I don't know why. My personal demon, I suppose.
I've noticed that some folks have a problem with punctuation. Maybe you could do a cute little rhyme for us about where periods ought to go, and when to use " marks...stuff like that.
Very nicely done, Teacher...you get an "A" on this one. And I'm adding some whipped cream to that apple pie...

[Rita L. Sev]

Thank you, Miss Angel! I guess I just have to be giving some kind of class... I'll have to work on that punctuation poem. I did write one a while ago about proofreading - I'll dig it out for you.

I had to smile at your "i before e" issue - I had a boy in last year's class that worked so hard to get that right. With every vocab test, he'd mutter, "i before e, except after c..." He actually helped the whole class... :)

[Angel]

LOL...that little boy could be me...=))

[TL Boehm]

some wry bread please! Oh I love this. It is humorous and well penned - the there/their/they're thing gets me as does the your/you're thing.

[Rita L. Sev]

Thanks so much, Tammy! Sometimes I have to stop reading student papers; I get so frustrated by these peeves, I miss the good content of their writing...

[Sami Khalil]

A teacher in her excellent craft...Thank you for sharing this gem...:)

[Rita L. Sev]

Or, a teacher in her "crazy" mode! Ha! Thanks, Sami, for seeing it so nicely!

[Sami Khalil]

My pleasure...:)

[Marie]

This poem should be required reading for everyne who posts work on this site. I get so tired of wading through misused words and misplacedd apostrophes.

[Rita L. Sev]

The apostrophes are another pet peeve. Thanks, Marie - maybe I'll suggest that to admin... ;)

[quinfinn]

nauseating isn't it? my pet peeve is "to much" , but there are many others and you have covered many of them....well done.

[Rita L. Sev]

Quin, I had many more stanzas in mind... but I was getting tired! Thanks! ;)

[quinfinn]

i humbly await your sequel.....

[Jack...]

Rita, now I know why I flunked English in my senoir year. (I didn't have a teacher like you) I always had a problem their, there and they're because being the redneck that i am i always want to wirte thar. And tell me this if bow and tow and mow rhyme what happened to cow?

[Rita L. Sev]

Ah - well, the English language is tricky, with its pronunciation rules... :) In my classes, there/their/they're is a common error, but more annoying than that is "youse" - as in "Did youse go to the Phillies game last night?" ;)

[Jack...]

Or another South Philly favorite...geet, as in "I'm hungry, geet yet."

[Rita L. Sev]

"Me an my mom just had a samich..." LOL!

[Marie]

Here we'd say Did yall go to the Philies game last night?"

[Baby Ricochet]

I do my best but I do make mistakes.

[Marie]

Baby, you always mix up "to" and "too". But I've always forgiven you.

[Rita L. Sev]

Mark, I am not ranting at anyone in particular - and you know, if it messes with clarity, I try to let you know gently!

Marie, that's a nice, forgiving couplet! :)