You Left Me Empty

You Left Me Empty

A Poem by Riley McKinney

You take my breath away. 
You break my heart.  
You crush my soul. 
You shatter my sanity. 
And you lock them in a vault which I don't have a combination for. 

You left behind a black hole where my heart once was.
A cavern where my soul should be.  
Delusions where sanity once lived.  
And dust in my lungs. 
I am broken. 
Broken because of you. 
I am empty and isolated 
because your greed would not be satisfied by my love alone. 
It needed every piece of me. 

So, it took my breath away.
It broke my heart. 
It crushed my soul.
And, it shattered my sanity.
    

© 2016 Riley McKinney


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you touched my heart with your words

You left behind a black hole where my heart once was.
A cavern where my soul should be.
Delusions where sanity once lived.
And dust in my lungs.


Posted 8 Years Ago


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V
Sad and brokenhearted write yet you managed this tone pretty well. Unfortunately a feeling many can relate to. Still a nicely written piece.

Posted 8 Years Ago


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mou
it is full of sorrow..many people come in our life and their existence is governed by our fate..whether they are good or not but always left a lesson..but if someone really mean to be your will wait for you and come back again..
I really like it and emotion is very vibrant which make it precious.
keep up writing!

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 8 Years Ago


I thought it was good, but could use some improvement. For instance, maybe using some other verb for what they're doing to your lungs in the first verse? I think it would just flow better together if it was along the ideas of the first three. Crush, shatter, and break just all sound very destructive, but 'take my breath away' doesn't. Maybe start out with that one, and work your way up? Other than that, very good poem!

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 8 Years Ago



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Added on June 30, 2016
Last Updated on August 2, 2016