Perverting the Narrative

A True Story

Visualize for a second that you're this real s**t-kicker-a*****e. With a constant half-smile, a smirk, like you're slow, or maybe told a joke that no one else heard.

For a second picture that you're me. You're cute with a bit of that Robert Downey Jr. charm, so girls look the other way. The same guys who can't stand you, call you "f****t" in their heads, keep you around just to leave things interesting.

And your only redeeming quality is your immense capacity for loving your girlfriend. Who might honestly be the only person you even like.

So despite how badly you want to enslave her into forever with you, when she gets an east coast scholarship, you let her go. Mostly because you think she can do better, know she can. This girl is so far out of your league, she makes you look 20,000 leagues under the sea. And being the real s**t-for-brains that you are, it never even occurs to you that this girl reciprocates your exact feelings.

So your one and only selfless act? It comes off as a slight.

The weeks go by and even though you try to stay in touch, you just cause her more pain. You get a call from her merry gang of Manhattanites, her new pals, all of whom are worried about her. So you fly your a*s to New York, you try and fix things, but there's now a rift, an endless disconnect and you leave things even worse for wear.

It's only a week before you get the only phone call that you'll never forget, your one-and-only downed a bottle of pills and never woke up again.

The line between guilt and grief is a tight-rope. Self-destruction was so always my thing.

This is my tell-all, the skeleton in my closet, my confession. I'm giving you the story I refused to give the judge. Tomorrow I go to jail for crashing my Honda Weapon-of-Mass-Destruction Accord, while drunk, almost killing another driver.

The thing they forget to mention about suicide, is that 90% of them end in ignominious failure. 

Reviews

[ANTO]

Another gritty vignette from the amazing pen of RileyRedding - no one does this like you my friend. Your penchant for that turn of phrase that make me sit up and go wtf is matched only by your ability to deliver same in a big basket of wtf.
Great stuff Riley

[RileyRedding]

Haha that's some high praise my friend!

[Cool Girl]

Goodness. I think Im gonna either cry or scream... So much emotion here, Riley. And the sad part is that it's a true story
that totally sucks.
:(

[RileyRedding]

Thanks a million!

[Cool Girl]

RILEY! I thought you left forever! Don't ever scare me like that.. You had Afraa and I worried..

[RileyRedding]

Well it isn't as if I did it on purpose!

All is well here. I hope your doing the same.

[Cool Girl]

Afraa closed her profile again:(
I miss her...
And Lizardo is leaving and coming back at the end of March :(
But otherwise, all is well

[RileyRedding]

How tragic. Lots has changed in my absence.

[Cool Girl]

Yes. She never got to say goodbye to you:(
Well, let's all remember Afraa and how great a friend she was..

[RileyRedding]

I have alternative means of communicating with her haha.

This is the age of Facebook.

[Cool Girl]

Lucky xD
I'm not allowed to have one

[Rene Salinas]

Well -- you can imagine and write stories in general but Life will always have the best stories to tell and it is just a simple fact there is no knowing into the unfolding of destiny or fate or whatever your creed will dictate. For me the theme however is the amazing reality of the frailty of being human. Going from the sublime to the ridiculous in one go! When the going is good is really good but when it is bad damn it is horrid. The feelings unraveled from the phonecall onwards, oh, in my case I went for inmediate guilt!

What that guilt however sparks as in reaction was terrifying and consequently destructive.

An extremly intense view into a fragment of Life.

Redemption remains at a distance in the horizon.

Thank you.

[Matching Socks]

wow. i think i am going to cry.

[Bee C.]

Hot damn. This was a kick in the teeth if ever I read one. True grit, true salt.
But it's a masterpiece. No question. Your writing is exceptional, never fails to turn my head and transport me into another soul. As per usual, awesome writing Riley.

[The Twin Arenas]

Also - f*****g crazy, bro.

[The Twin Arenas]

Weird. Yeah, the aftermath of failed suicides is something that has always held massive attraction for me. Good writing, Riles. You're very good at using familiar phrases and turning them into new things by butting them up against themselves or other s**t. Nice write. I have to go buy some pants. Later.