Upon these words ⁓ (gentle peace)

Quatrains in 8-Count (iambic tetrameter/final line [for Barrett] begins trochaic) with an abcb, defe, ghih, etc; rhyme scheme.

Author's Note

Picture from Wikimedia Commons.

I hope you'll enjoy this moment shared.

Constructive comments and critique are always welcome! : )

Reviews

[redd Brick Keshner]

The 'I's' have it and so do the 'my's.' The poem is not peppered and littered with them which makes the poem so much about the loved and still retain a modicum of interaction with the narrator/speaker. The last three stanzas elevate as the love between both parties meld with the world outside, enjoining nature and beauty lift up love and not 'war.' Love is waging peace. Thanks for sharing, Richard.

[Richard🖌]

Very astutely interpreted, Frederick 🤓

Quite keen of you, too, realizing how a deluge of I's and me's disallow readers' enjoyment of joining-in, relating, and being included. Still, if one had the mind to do so, the same message could be delivered with even more of them removed.
How sincerely rewarding it is to know that you've perceived the deeper core essences of this rather affectionally peaceful work.

Thank you, Brother Frederick.
M'best to thee! ⁓ Richard🖌

[ReedWrite]

I love the feel of this poem, Richard. The rhythm and flow. The lilt. The cadence and rhyme. Yet, woven through it all is a sense of gentle freedom, like a butterfly dancing on a spring morning. There's a sense of floating into an embrace that encompasses more than the physical realm of bodies and limbs. The words are as ethereal as sunlight dancing on clouds...yet speak volumes to those with the ability to listen. A beautiful poem. Thank you for sharing this.

[Richard🖌]

Quickly,
I am beginning to relish your reviews for their unique touches of genuine appeal and gratification … so much a part of why I put forth the effort to compose and share my poems with those who best relate and understand, whom connect deepest with the essence of their meanings … obviously, you want me to know you/we/they do.

How wonderful it is to see your name under one of my little offerings ≥ thank you dearly and sincerely, dear Poetess! ⁓ Richard

[ReedWrite]

It is my pleasure...truly. I am enjoying each new poem of yours I read...and in the reading, I find myself inspired to compose. You and I are the opposite ends of the spectrum, you know. Your work is the light...love...soul-sharing side of love. Mine is the darker side. Yet that is not a bad thing. Like yin and yang, both are needed for the other to exist. They compliment and balance one another. I crave that glimpse of the light your words offer...and perhaps, something in you connects to the darker emotion that flows through my pen. Either way, I enjoy your work very much, and feel like each new poem I read is another small present under the Christmas tree for me to unwrap and enjoy.

[Richard🖌]

Relativity is a most wondrous ideal to me … the thought that for everything there is it equal and opposite that allows it to exist. The darker side of an individual,the lighter their opposite side exists, and so it goes, and so you will find it is within my poetry — as you read-on.
How lovely the thought they are presents under a tree!
You make my heart smile! : D

[ReedWrite]

So true. Never trust someone who insists they are only what you see. We are all composed of light and dark. How we balance that, determines who we are. I think acknowledging it comes first...understanding it is slower in coming, but that is what life is about, isn't it? Growth? And, yes...reading your poetry is like opening a present. Each so unique. It's time to open another, I think. :)

[Richard🖌]

Ohhh-MY … BLUSH*

[Susan 🦋]

Well Richard, you know I cant offer any suggestions with the technical stuff..so lets chat subject matter. If I wasn't already swooning with a whisper of "you are mine".....you definitely got me with"as one, our souls began to sing"..... there is such a tenderness with this piece!!..a softness, pure delight..oh my you!...yet raging dogs of war"...such is life and the balance... but end with hope. Always have to hold on to hope.

[Richard🖌]

Now, Susan Sweet✨

Where in the stars above did your enthralling review become lost for five long years? 🤔
A treasure, a treat, such gracious loveliness dancing from your pen into my heart and soul ⁓ I'd wait another five for your caressing words, to feel as enchanted as I do now by the spell they've cast upon my hopeful bardic soul.

Thank you for reaching out from so long ago to embrace me … umm* ⁓ Richard🖌

[J.J. NIGHTINGALE]

Lovely..Beautiful................... Soft.. Nice

Jazzy

[Richard🖌]

Awww, Jasmine 🤫

Don't tell anyone how clumsy I am to have missed a single word spoken so softly and sweetly from your lovely voice.
Thank you, Dearest.🍷
I hope you'll forgive me for being so late.

"Lovely..Beautiful................... Soft.. Nice"
You've described yourself sooo perfectly! ⁓ Richard🖌

[J.J. NIGHTINGALE]

Been away 1 1/2 yrs... You are welcome...

[Marianne Rose]

What a beautiful lovesong, capturing the sweet moments that change our perception and allow us to see all the colors and movement rather than the dark greys of life. I can easily picture this time, the sights and sounds captured and said softly to the lover by your side. How wondrous to feel this through your words, perfect choices, like "cerulean skies" and pomegranate lips, the lushness of these moments conveyed in such phrases. Beautiful Richard, and glad to see you back again here to grace us with your poetry.

[Richard🖌]

Ahhh, Lady Marianne 🌹

Five years … from You … well worth the wait. 😌
So seldom I receive such entreating words from a poetess that wraps my senses so warmly I can virtually feel her vibrant presence within and upon my entirety.

Whomever 'twas said words don't convey reality, never read yours. 😏
Thank you ever-so dearly, Dear Marianne!
⁓ Richard🖌

[Riddhi]

This poem is very beautiful...you penned down your feelings very nicely in this poem....
keep on writing and thanks for sharing....
take care...
riddhi

[Richard🖌]

Hi, Dear Little Poetess1 : )
It is so nice to receive this visit from you today … I was needing some sunshine*

Riddhi, your words of praise and appreciation for this heartful piece have truly gratified and encouraged my efforts to keep writing and sharing … I can't thank you enough for the lovely thoughtfulness you've gifted this very happy bard … hugs to You! ⁓ Richard

[Riddhi]

your most welcome richard...will you do me a favour...will you review my poem A LETTER TO THE MURDERES OF PEACE - THE TERRORISTS...and share your view with me on that topic....

[Richard🖌]

For You (if it is a poem) I most enthusiastically will, Riddhi. : )
I just reviewed your inspiring and power "Dream India" poem … goodness, it was fabulous!

[Riddhi]

Yes i just read your review and your words have motivated me to write more poems...Thank you so much richard...

[Richard🖌]

I humbly bow⁓*

[William Liston]

This poem is so beautiful ... it may be your best love poem yet (it's at least third place, in my book).

From the enthralling visual presentation to the smoothly flowing words, I've truly enjoyed this piece. I also enjoyed the rhyme scheme; it's consistent, but not every line rhymes, which (in my opinion) helps to add a sense of freedom, reminiscent of this poem's care-free and easy-going vibe ... it's like everything moved in slow motion as I read it (if that makes sense).

I loved the last stanza, especially the line "Cease thee, ye raging dogs of war." That line really helped to bring contrast to this piece in a somewhat ironic way.

I have no critiques to offer ... you've done great with this one.

- William Liston

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, William,
It is a joyful honor to share my humble little poetic renderings with you, My Friend.
When you speak of poetry one will always know your words are honest, whether in critique or praise, enjoyment or lack of any parts, thereof, and it is those times you've helped and gratified my labors, and encouraged me to compose better works.
One thing a poet knows for certain from your reviews, William … you've actually read and made a genuine effort to understand it with your best effort(s).

For these very attributes extended and applied in your review of this piece, I am most grateful, My Friend … thank you again, sincerely! ⁓ Richard

[Lydia Shutter]

Such a glorious poem of love. I see a family with a loving couple at the helm...children at their feet. Just a warm and wonderful write, Richard. Lydi**

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, Dear Lydi, for gracing my humble little poem of aspiring romance that conquers all … we wish! : )
Your take on this one hits the mark dead center, even painting a picture more beautiful and endearing than than my simple mind ever could … and, I love it!

You're the sweetest ever, Dear Lady-Poet … hugs 'n smiles! ⁓ Richard

[The Girl on Fire]

'Beside thee there I am, my love,
Sure as the stars above all shine.
In each and every gentle breeze,
I whisper softly,"You are mine." '
It's so touching...so sweet...so beautiful..
You've used imagery in such a good way that the reader can feel and imagine every single thing without any problem.
Seriously loved this one!
Please keep writing more such poems :)

[Richard🖌]

Gosh, Yashita!
You're spoiling me — I hope you don't stop! ; )

What an endearing verse you've selected … it's one of mine, too.
Your enjoyment of this humble little effort makes my heart dance and my spirit smile; for, it is my highest aim to please those who are generous enough to read and review for me my earnest poetic labors, and to know you grasp it so completely and easily is gratification even higher.

There are many more such poems as this one on my pages, dear poet … please, enjoy to your heart's content.
Thank you ever-so warmly, Yashita … hugs to you! ⁓ Richard : )

[Richard🖌]

I meant to say, "What an endearing verse you've selected … it's a favorite one of mine, too."
read moreI meant to say, "What an endearing verse you've selected … it's a favorite one of mine, too."
Sometimes, I think these fingers leave my hands … LOL!

[The Girl on Fire]

Always welcome, and Oh, I don't think I'll ever stop! ; )

[Richard🖌]

"B L U S H !"