The River, the Clouds, and Us.... (longing)

Free Verse

Author's Note

Picture: compliments of Wikimedia Commons.

Something set me into a wispy, dreamlike, drifting-off mood.

Please, feel free to offer critique, or anything you feel will help improve this piece! : )

Reviews

[Lyn Anderson]

I love the cloudy images -- that stanza in particular is striking. The feeling of falling in love with a moody person, and the speaker is the calm anchor ...

one minor thing, I am sure it is just a typo or pesky auto-correct, but its journey does not require an apostrophe, unless there is something in that sentence I am missing.

[Richard🖌]

That you've again blessed one of my pieces, KL … how very happy this makes me feel!
Then, that you love anything about this piece and find it striking, is reward beyond any I could have expected.
I like the wording of your interpretation, too … "speaker", "calm anchor".

About the recent "rogue apostrophe" typos: It is like when one uses loose for lose, their for they're, sell for sale … you know we know better, but get into too big a hurry, concentrating on what we're into, to catch all the wee details, even when we go back through trying to, but not to worry, someone with a keen eye who cares will come along and lend a helping hand, like you always do thank you sincerely, KL! : )

You've left a nice, helpful, and gracious review … warmly appreciated! ⁓ Richard

[Willard Wells]

I enjoyed this work a great deal, the imagery and metaphors were done to perfection. Beautifully done, it even added a little extra tranquility to the moment. Thank you.

[Richard🖌]

Dear Willard,
I could not be more happy to receive your review for this piece, for it reflects in exactness that which I had hoped it would from some knowing poet or poetess.

Why am I not surprised it is You, My Fine Friend … thank you sincerely! ⁓ Richard

[Raylene]

I love the line "I'm like the river" very powerful message of relaxing into becoming one with nature dear such beautiful write my dear Richard.

[Richard🖌]

Raylene,
You've endowed this piece of poetry with a special glow of clarity and life-force it would not have had if not for You.

How can I find the words to thank you enough … my warmest, most grateful hug to You! ⁓ Richard

[Raylene]

Anytime dear

[Beccy]

There is indeed a dreamlike quality to these lovely lines. I very much enjoy allegorical poetry and this is a fine, fine example; and just like a river running from it's source to the sea, it has the same kind of delightful flow.

Oh, and the title is just perfect.

Beccy.

[Richard🖌]

Gosh, Beccy!

How wondrously pleasing your words of understanding and feeling of this piece caress and gratify my senses … you truly make a hopeful bard's heart and spirit dance.

I love it, too, that you approve the title with a "perfect" award … I'm blushing! ⁓ Richard

[R.M.C]

A wonderful image inspiring piece Richard. It's been a while since I've read one of your poems but with your telent, every time I read one it's as if I'm rediscovering the beauty and power of poetry all over again. This metaphoric approach iis befitting of the context and the aspects of nature... Really helping the reader not only picture the scenes and feel what you're saying, but to connect our own lives to nature - which, after reading this piece, now seems more natural and perfect, like we were made in relation to the world around us. Great write.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, Ross, for the brilliant review in gratifying commentary to this rather Nature-bound piece of metaphoric wandering.

You've made me appreciate this work in a way I never otherwise would have … bless you, My Friend! ⁓ Richard

[R.M.C]

My pleasure Richard.

[Sami Khalil]

A gift of beauty you share with us from a gifted poet with keen eyes and romantic significance. thank you for sharing, sir...:).............

[Richard🖌]

It is my pleasure, Sami! : )
I thank you, as-well, My Friend, for your expressed enjoyment, recognition, and inspirational praise.

Many blessings upon your days, and "A Happy 4th of July!" ⁓ Richard

[Sami Khalil]

Same to you. You are welcome. .....:))))

[Lydia Shutter]

A magical write. I was carried away in the reverie of staring out at the river and dreaming of a lover. "I watched the gray clouds building, bullying the white ones into submission" what a GREAT line this is! Often negativity in the world wins out over positivity....if only it would not. A love that hurts you time and again.....yet you need it in your life. I can identify! The words in this one flowed easily and so sweetly. Lydi**

[Richard🖌]

Hi, Lydi Sweet! : )
Such a beautiful way to start a July 4th Celebration Day, with one of your lovely, intelligent, embracing, encouraging, always treasured, and insightful reviews.

You've again touched my heart, gratifying my desire to share and please … big fireworks hugs to you, Lydi Dear! ⁓ Richard

[Lydia Shutter]

Happy 4th to you as well, Richard. Stay safe.

[Vatsal Rohilla (account..]

This metaphorical piece is commendable to a great degree. Simple words, but great style. I like the first stanza very much. "What the moment held"- a very nice style of stating the line.
The comparison you have made with the river and the cloud is pretty amazing. The flow is superb and the poem is lovable.
Also, "the black clouds cause the white clouds to submit" has so much imagery and the comparison made later on is fascinating. Excellent piece of poem. Keep writing.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you ever-so gratefully, Vatsal : )
To receive such, appreciative, inspiring, praising, and gratifying a review, I think I will "Keep writing".
I've very much enjoyed your favorite choices and expressed understanding take on this unusually image-laden piece from my (sometimes) overly-creative pen, My Friend, and I am truly moved by your compliments, as-well!

May many gracious blessings find their way into your heart, My Friend! ⁓ Richard

[jacob erin-cilberto]

metaphorically and allegorically this is wonderful...

if we listen hard enough we can hear ourselves in the thunder of the sky and in the thunder of the raging rivers---
but there are also those moments, the whisper, the gurgling brooks...the sound of the rain, softly falling...like our own moods...and as elements of nature live together, we find this with significant others as well..

really well done, Richard.

j.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you sincerely, Jacob! : )
You've gifted this early morning "4th of July" an encouraging and appreciative beginning!
Your parables and analogies are every bit as poetically fetching as the poem's.

Bless you for sharing them, and for your ending compliment, as-well, My Astute Friend, and "A Rousing Happy Independence Day, to You!" ⁓ Richard

[softlyfall]

You clearly have a wonderful grasp of human nature. Your analogy, nature and human nature, is wonderful as well. It gives such immediacy of setting and adds dimension to the protagonist.
I love the way your voice remains conversational yet is also elevated to the literary.
I am awake in the dead of night, as is often the case. Tonight I am more than happy about it, as I have discovered two extremely gifted poets here. I will head back to bed with a grin and read more of your work in the morning.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you most happily, Dear SF! : )
You've began my 4th of July Celebration with a genuinely warm feeling of being understood and enjoyed.
The level of your commentary assures me your praise, grasp, and encouragement are valid and well-placed in homage to my earnest creative efforts to entertain and please my readers.

"Happy Independence Day to You, M'Lady," and a day as beautiful as you've made mine … my very warmest, most happy hug of thanks to you! ⁓ Richard

(you've a cute profile pic, BTW)