The River, the Clouds, and Us.... (longing)

Free Verse

Author's Note

Picture: compliments of Wikimedia Commons.

Something set me into a wispy, dreamlike, drifting-off mood.

Please, feel free to offer critique, or anything you feel will help improve this piece! : )

Reviews

[Lyn Anderson]

I love the cloudy images -- that stanza in particular is striking. The feeling of falling in love with a moody person, and the speaker is the calm anchor ...

one minor thing, I am sure it is just a typo or pesky auto-correct, but its journey does not require an apostrophe, unless there is something in that sentence I am missing.

[Richard🖌]

That you've again blessed one of my pieces, KL … how very happy this makes me feel!
Then, that you love anything about this piece and find it striking, is reward beyond any I could have expected.
I like the wording of your interpretation, too … "speaker", "calm anchor".

About the recent "rogue apostrophe" typos: It is like when one uses loose for lose, their for they're, sell for sale … you know we know better, but get into too big a hurry, concentrating on what we're into, to catch all the wee details, even when we go back through trying to, but not to worry, someone with a keen eye who cares will come along and lend a helping hand, like you always do thank you sincerely, KL! : )

You've left a nice, helpful, and gracious review … warmly appreciated! ⁓ Richard

[Brianna Brie]

Nature is so poetic in its own right. The imagery is splendid in this poem. Combining the river and the clouds as a representation of relational interactions is unique. Your words inspire me.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you warmly, Brianna! : )

T'would seem we've again connected in deeply meaningful ways, as garnered by virtue of your keen familiarity with the more esoteric nuances of this rather abstract piece in metaphoric rise … few (if any) grasp me as you seem to.

"Tis you inspiring me! ⁓ Richard

[Valentine]

Nice way to do comparisons, when I look at the sky, its changing colors and beauty I see God's canvas laid out for all of us to see. Valentine

[Richard🖌]

Hi, Dear Kathie! : )
Thank you so very much for the nice compliment, and for sharing your lovely thoughts and depths of insight.

Warmest ugs 'n blessings to you! ⁓ Richard

[The Girl on Fire]

I can't explain anything in detail, coz I'm new to writing poems that are just...let's say, perfect. I can just say that it was stupendous.
I loved the way you beautifully expressed what many people are obsessed by, when that dreamlike, drifting-off mood strikes them.
Lovely poem. Hope you help me too in pointing out the errors in mine. You're a wonderful poet :)

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, Dear Yashita,
Welcome to my pages … I an thrilled you meandering along to find this little effort to read and leave such wondrously beautiful, sweetly inspiring words of praise and enjoyment for a bard to smile with gracious gratitude.
Well, I've yet to read your writing, but if it's anything like your review, I'm more than a little certain I'll love it, and as for helping you, I'm always willing and happy to lend a hand when and where I can.

With happy smiles 'n warmest hugs! ⁓ Richard : )

[LastMonth]

Nice experience.

Going to digress for a moment,

Your Writing is often more then just writing.
Akin to food in a restaurant.

I'll compare the Pictures you add to the pleasant A.C cooling the place.
I'll compare the Fonts you pick to the kind, hospitable and easy on the eyes waitress,
And the little difference of the gray background, making the writing feel special, I'll compare it to a bright neon sign, filling you with hope as you pat your empty belly.

AHEM,

Good poem. I liked the image of the Clouds bullying another cloud. Very powerful, very thoughtful. Very original.

The rest of it is equally satisfying, the last bit is on the spot.
Great job.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, Dear Poet, with a friendly welcome to my pages! : )

Most gratefully and appreciatively, I am humbled, gratified, and encouraged by the fullness of proficient and full expression, contained in your well-struck review, to this meandering piece of Nature/human experience.
I find your analogy of this piece to be creatively original, cute, and meaningful in such an enjoyably metaphorical way, that is truly "filling" to the senses' palate … LOL!
I dearly love compliments and positive attention to one of my earnest efforts … it so rewarding, and your expressed appreciation and sincere-feeling praise is like icing on the cake.

I bow in great humility for your gift of receiving pleasure from this little work in Free Verse form … bright blessings for your days, LM! ⁓ Richard

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

Nice poesy! It had an amazing, storytelling, cozy feel to it. The first stanza was engaging, and everything else held me in accord.

[Richard🖌]

Hi, Cypian! : )
Welcome to my pages, Poet!
Many grateful thanks to you for selecting this modest Free Verse piece, dedicated to the emotion of longing to read and review, and most certainly for your hoped-for reward of positive praise.

My best to you! ⁓ Richard

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

Hi, Richard! :)
Thank you for the welcome.
You're most welcome for the comment!

Have a great one!

[Hyacinth]

I really like how you've worded this, it would seem that you that you gave a natural talent for this kinda thing.

Only one thing though, i think the line "Somwhere along the way...my focus changed" would be better off without the elipses. I just thing it disturbed the rythm a tiny bit. This is beautiful though, thanks for posting.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, Hyacinth!
It is with great humbleness and gratification I read and receive your words of praise and recognition of my earnest hopes and skills to please those whom come to partake of my poetic efforts.
I am deeply in your debt for catching that spot of weakness in this otherwise rather exceptionally commended work of Free Verse.
It is now set into the order it was meant to be when transferring from word-processor to posting window … it's incumbent on each of us to keep mindful of line-breaks and such that are apt to jump out of order.

It is such keen-eyed attention to detail as yours that is so gratifying to your friends
Again, I most gratefully and graciously thank you … smiles 'n blessings! ⁓ Richard

[Hyacinth]

No need to thank me, Richard. I just strongly believe in telling the truth and offering praise when it is due (also advice when needed.) I know that in my 12 years it has helped me alot.

I'm glad to know that I could be of help as well. I will definitely check out more of your work as I adore writing like this- some would call me an old soul.

[Ruth]

The beautiful rise and fall along the cycle of nature here is breathtaking. Reminds me of a soul as fragile as a seed and yet as strong as the rain that delivers emotion. Sigh...beautiful :)

[Richard🖌]

Oh-MY, Ruth!
The beauty and depth of your wondrous words eclipse my humble little efforts, and I'd write a hundred of these to receive them.

A warmly gracious embrace to thee, Dear Lady-Poet! ⁓ Richard

[Einstein Noodle]

oh my goodness ..you wrote this just for me!!! i just know it .. stunning ...simple language ..packed with ignited feelings and with vivid scenes ..really like the connection to the cycles of water ..one of my favorite things ..besides trees and forests ;)
KL told me you are the go to man for classic poetry so i am here reading and have subscribed to you ... in hopes of expanding my experience ... of course this your most recent is free verse ;) well done says i! enjoyed reading very much
E.

[Richard🖌]

Hah, you scoundrel … I've caught you!

E, you've been sneaking around in my head, peeking into spots no one else is supposed to see … LOL!

Yes, it is but a plain old Free Verse … not much here to learn from, but i sure do appreciate your keen take and thoughtful praise on it, My Friend … truly.

Maybe, something more structured will better suit your poetical hunger, eh? : )
I've plenty of them on here … thanks for making sharing such fun! ⁓ Richard

[Einstein Noodle]

you are welcome ..and thank you for being here! :) reading and attempting to write classics in different forms helps keep me honest about myself ... so i do read them and attempt them from time to time ..but i have a strong inclination to be free and get better at language .. really good to get to know you a bit Richard ..and thank you so much for your strong help with the English Sonnet!

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, E,
With great humility, My Friend, you're welcome to whatever i might have to offer your needs.
Keep mindful that there is no greater teacher of language than properly composed poetry … it is the most powerful form of written expression known, so resist limiting yourself to the easy stuff; it won't raise you up to your highest potential, My Very Fine Friend! : )

It is my distinct pleasure to share with you, E … thank You!

[Papaya]

Super! :)
What else can I offer.
You've described the vicious circle of a passionate and sometimes stormy relationship so wonderfully.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, Ana, for your wonderful compliment! : )
You have the sweetest and most warming way of making my day smile.

Many happy blessings to you, Dear Poetess! ⁓ Richard

[Papaya]

And to you as well Richard. :)

[Marianne Rose]

I love and relate to the visuals and tones, painting with words. It installs peace in me, even without the love story it also tells. Thank you for a beautifully written poem where I could travel with you.

[Richard🖌]

Here, let me make room for you beside me, Marianne!
I was afraid i might have to travel alone, but now that fear is allayed and unfounded ⁓ by virtue of your gentle, warm, and caring presence.

I cannot thank you enough for your wondrous blessings! ⁓ Richard

[Marianne Rose]

Ah, to sit beside you, in one held moment, drifting and writing . . . Instead here am I, amidst the sounds of lawn mowers and chainsaws. Never mind . . .

If you can, join me in "Love Embarks" and "Grace Moves Me, I Step Aside". Anxious to hear what you think of my attempts at Villanelle.