The River, the Clouds, and Us.... (longing)

Free Verse

Author's Note

Picture: compliments of Wikimedia Commons.

Something set me into a wispy, dreamlike, drifting-off mood.

Please, feel free to offer critique, or anything you feel will help improve this piece! : )

Reviews

[Lyn Anderson]

I love the cloudy images -- that stanza in particular is striking. The feeling of falling in love with a moody person, and the speaker is the calm anchor ...

one minor thing, I am sure it is just a typo or pesky auto-correct, but its journey does not require an apostrophe, unless there is something in that sentence I am missing.

[Richard🖌]

That you've again blessed one of my pieces, KL … how very happy this makes me feel!
Then, that you love anything about this piece and find it striking, is reward beyond any I could have expected.
I like the wording of your interpretation, too … "speaker", "calm anchor".

About the recent "rogue apostrophe" typos: It is like when one uses loose for lose, their for they're, sell for sale … you know we know better, but get into too big a hurry, concentrating on what we're into, to catch all the wee details, even when we go back through trying to, but not to worry, someone with a keen eye who cares will come along and lend a helping hand, like you always do thank you sincerely, KL! : )

You've left a nice, helpful, and gracious review … warmly appreciated! ⁓ Richard

[LazerRays]

Very smooth and almost like a trance. You ha a way of lulling me into a fantasy world of your words. Calm, but yet fast paced like a river. It hummed with spirit and life as well. A very fine poem indeed

[Richard🖌]

It's so lovely, Sarah ✨

The adjectives you've used in describing the sensations of your feelings and understandings of this rather pensive Free Verse piece.
Your words, an intimate poem in themselves, have touched me, as-well.
It's beautiful how you've fallen into the moment's meanings of my own words.
You're a blessing to a bard's hope to share, connect, and please.

Thank you most warmly, Sarah ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Kay/Hayden]

Wow You definitely set my standards high for future poems I read of yours! So imaginative and relatable. The first lines are my favorite! Have a wonderful Thanksgiving! -Kay

[Richard🖌]

Hi, Kay 👋

What a wonderfully lovely and thoughtful review you've gifted this rather pensive Free Verse effort.
It's appreciation and praise like yours that inspire me to keep writing and sharing.
I can see why you've selected the lines you have … the first two verses, in particular, relate so closely to both of us, eh?

Thank you sincerely for your charming visit, Dear Kay -- I wish you a most Happy Thanksgiving, as-well. ⁓ Richard 🍃

[John Alexander McFadyen]

This has a classical, almost mystical feel to it as nature and the river become the metaphor for life's passage and the rage and calm it often offers. As with your more formal pieces it is word perfect, phrase perfect and so well constructed.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, John, my honorable friend. ✊

I suppose there is little (if any) reason why Free Verse cannot be a classic in its own right; though, few would ever think it's so … and, I can conceive of nothing more gratifying than for one as skilled a you to grasp and praise the very essence of my humble effort.
Ironically, I'll bet you can relate to the moment of this piece quite easily.

Bless you your kindness and thoughtful generosity! ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Cherrie Palmer]

The magic of water, the secrets it whispers, and the cycle of life that depends on its path. I love what you did with this and the photo paired with it, so relaxing.

[Richard🖌]

Gratefully yours, Cherrie 🌦

I can't thank you enough for sharing your keen keen insights and expressed appreciation for this rather yearning poem.

I am so very glad (and a bit surprised) you were able to find a bit of comfort and ease from amongst my humble efforts in this one, Cherrie … hugs! ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Cherrie Palmer]

Your welcome, I like when nature is given a persona and here you create a tempermintal love that the river perpetually pursues.

[Richard🖌]

Ah-YES, Dear Cherrie 🌦

This one is (maybe) overdone with metaphor, or from the comments in reviews, it seems few get the true gist of this piece. But, you've let me know you have, and what more could I hope than this? : )

Thank you, M'Lady ⁓ RJ 🍃

[Cherrie Palmer]

One of the best parts of writing is when our small little vision of a thing is given life with each read. It becomes something new (even to the one who wrote it) :) .

[Richard🖌]

So wisely and beautifully related, Dear Poetess. 🌱

[Just Kim]

I sat in rain for hours,
thinking about how much
you are like those clouds at times,
angry, petulant....
ready to dampen everything
at the slightest provocation;

So well written and such vivid imagery, This is so very good.

[Richard🖌]

Dear Kym 🌱

It's difficult to tell which of us enjoy the other more, but let it suffice to say I am more than a little warmed by your graciously inspiring words in review.

Thank you ever-so warmly, Kind, Lovely Poetess! ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Just Kim]

not a problem, I enjoy reading good, well written poetry.

[Richard🖌]

Gosh, Kym,
You sure do fill a poet with joy ⁓ thank You!

[Roland Petrov]

Never has the cycle of water been written about so beautifully, and I will never again sit beside a river without remembering this poem and thinking about the stories the river could tell. Many poems are forgettable; this one is not in that category.

[Richard🖌]

Ahhh-so, Roland 😃

I was wondering if there might come a time when you ran into across this rather wistfully ambiguous little Free Verse, and how delightful to know you not only grasp its essence, but its more metaphorical meanings, as-well.

Thank you so very mach, My Friend, for reading my simple verse and your meaningful review. ⁓ Richard🍃

[Unspoken poet]

then, there's me … I'm like the river,
soaking you in, feeding on you,

You have a wonderful way with metaphors in your writes, This is so very good, I love the above lines.
wonderful write, keep writing always

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, Kay-T, ever-so warmly and gratefully🌷

You always seem to pick the most meaningful lines.
It appears we agree on the valuable of metaphor in captivating poetry … how pleasing You truly are.

Your kind praise is quite gratifying too … happy thanks to You, and yes, I would very much like to "keep writing always" … hugs 'n blessings, Kay-T ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Eilis]

Loving anyone, especially over a stretch of time, carries with it challenges that aren't easily predictable at the outset. I really enjoy the way this poem explores the ways that relationships can bring together two different forces, and maybe there will be difficulties, but, also --out of the difference can come a richness of feeling.

The river and cloud analogy is lovely. The river itself can be wild, but here it is the calming, absorbing force that allows the wildness of the sky to let itself go as necessary. Depending on how this is read, I think the cloud force could be something negative (controlling or insensitive) or something enriching (bringing excitement and challenge). I suppose relationships have the power to shift within us day to day. Very little about our life experiences are fixed, so, what feels enthralling today may feel smothering tomorrow.

Your poem offers a sense of the changefulness of both nature and the human mind/heart. The reaching that all things do to find the perfect way to settle. Of course the settling is always temporary. But when that point is reached (even briefly) there's a peace. Still debating in my own mind on how this poem-moment is resolved, but there is a sense of a push-pull between peace and the tumult.

Love the photo you chose to pair with this, Richard. It offers a real sense of the layers of experience and the gray that can sometimes permeate. Really enjoyed this poem.

[Richard🖌]

Well, goodness-ME, Dear Eilis 🌾

Every now and again the site decides I don't need to know a review awaits my attention.

And, such a marvelously replete grasp of this rather poignant piece, yearning for a more completely embracing warmth of affection you've shared with me … how being lifted, only to be let fall time and again feels, like the cycles of rain warmed by the sun and cooled by thin atmosphere.

Your powerfully gentle, life-wisened voice whispers in deeply abiding ways, more than appealingly vibrant to my senses; indeed, irresistibly engaging, enchantingly captivating, and winsomely fascinating, to say the least … enticing, I might say, to know more You.
A flirt, yes, but (more-so) a hopeful bardic confession. ; )

As you've clearly discerned, Dear Eilis, this piece is fraught with metaphorical imagery and nuances, because I could conceive of no clearer way to express the ongoing feeling of unrequited love, without resorting to poetic prose, and from the sheer eloquence of your interpretations, it seems to have worked for You, and this assures me that, at least, one other gets me.

Thank you, Dear Poetess, for possessing the skills for letting me know I've not failed.
With my warmest hug and happiest blessing of gratitude! ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Betty Hermelee]

I love the flow of this poem, so dreamy-like, yet also lovely description of moods, the way the clouds change, the way the sun peeks out; beautiful metaphors to nature; enjoyed your read,
Yours,
Betty

[Richard🖌]

Hi, Betty : )

Thank you ever-so warmly for selecting this rather poignantly yearning piece to read and comment on so descriptively; but, mostly, for enjoying and loving anything about it.

Your praise is gratifying, too … Happy 2020! ⁓ Richard🍃

[Betty Hermelee]

I love your writing! Happy 2020!