Divine Treasures ⁓ (sensually alluring)

English [Shakespearean] Sonnet

               

1st Place Winner

Sensual Sonnet Contest

Author's Note

Honest, constructive reviews, please.

Reviews

[Poetic Beauty]

This is what I would refer to as passionate. It has the longing and the yearning of those first heated encounters. Those unskillful yet so wonderful moments.

This is beautifully written. The flow is so smooth and delicate like the young lovers heart and yearning. Brilliantly done.

[Richard🖌]

Again, our thoughts' sensations entwine! 🤗

It's astounding the knack you have of expressing precisely what my mind enfolds beyond poetic words … a very rare few possess this gifted insight.
Thank you, Dear PB, for gracing me with your kind intelligence, lovely countenance, and endearingly gracious praise.

Warmly* ⁓ Richard🖌

[Poetic Beauty]

You are welcome. I have a detailed oriented mind and tend to be an empathic so I pick on small things others may not.

[Kathy Van Kurin]

Richard,
"Divine Treasures" was a fitting and positive portrayal of a perfect and kind motivation from the heart. I was impressed by its innocence and joy. "He loved God's flowers more than words can tell, but never near as much as your bouquet. This line is the message to me of this writing. Another really interesting part is it seems to be written in third person? Anyway very good poem...........bless you kathy

[Richard🖌]

Oh, Kathy!
How sweetly your words caress through my grateful senses, whispering nuances ever-so softly and tenderly, as only a woman graced with tender touches in her warm breath could.
Yes, with your selection, you have bared the core essence of this piece, and so eloquently.

Bless you your lovely praise and presence … I would have responded quicker, M'Lady, had the site notified me of your gorgeously fetching review … hugs! ⁓ Richard : )

[Kathy Van Kurin]

Richard,
You have such a way with words. I would think you were a writer or something....Love it. Thanks for your fun and sweet review.
Hugs to you too!
Kathy

[Einstein Noodle]

i read only the finished product and have nothing to say other than it flows so easy ..nothing forced ...no stretching of syntax in my mind and like Kl ... i don't count but i am quite sure you have met all the criteria for an English sonnet .. i read your most recent and this your oldest posted .. and i think they are similar in theme ... at least the ups and downs of love and the fineness of staying power in a relationship of love .. i think this is simply beautiful to read and experience
E.

[Richard🖌]

Many humbled thank you's, Dear Fellow Poet!

When a such a skilled and respected writer as yourself selects one of my little efforts to read and leave review of high praise and encouragement, an olde bard is made to feel gratified and inspired in very special ways.
Your keen observations and knowings in poetic expression and appreciation have revealed your understanding, to all the better assure me the efforts to write and share in hopes of pleasing my readers are on the right track.

Thank you again, My Fine Poet Friend … blessings to you! ⁓ Richard

[Einstein Noodle]

i think you think i am someone else ;) but thank you ..you must not have read my profile "About Me" ... i am not kidding in writing it ..well maybe a little about the Alzheimer's ... you are welcome sir! i intend to read more :)

[Richard🖌]

We've slept since this, My friend, but....
I know exactly who you are, Dear Gene … I've always known.😏
Please, do read more.

[Einstein Noodle]

ahahahaha .. yes .. well you have for sure my friend .. but 5 years ago you most likely did not read my "About Me" ... luv ya man! you are a great guy in my books!

[Lyn Anderson]

Since you went to my beginning I went to yours. First, might I say, I love the way you present your poems. They are elegant and well thought out. Second, I feel the rewrite is a polished and substantially improved version of the original. Now, that being said, I don't sit and count syllables and all that jazz -- I read it aloud, and if I like it, I like it. I am a stickler for grammar but flexible on form. As long is it works, I figure the form is good.

[Richard🖌]

Thank you for stopping-in, KL!
I appreciate you selecting these pieces to read and review, for your approval, and gratifying praise. It is pleasantly surprising to have anyone begin with my first posted poem(s), too … thanks for paying me back. : )

Seldom, I give token reviews, and before reviewing new (to me) poet's efforts I often read their first few postings, then, a few of their latest. I do this in order to determine if their skills have improved while here. This (potentially) reveals how those on the site may have influenced their progress through reviews and otherwise, or if at all. Then (typically), I'll review their first and latest postings with better knowledge to guide me about their efforts and to assist in deciding what kind and extent of praise, helpful critique, and comments to offer over-all.

If a metered/structured piece reads well, smoothly, and enjoyably, without significant stumbles, it usually is in count, and syllables need only be counted to try and determine what might have gone wrong, but it may be the order or selection or wording that causes a hitch, even if the count is spot-on.

Thank you immensely, KL, for sharing your thoughts of these simple little Sonnets! ⁓ Richard

[J. J. Nightingale]

A little porn..a little Lovely Sonnet Feel

Well done...(despite picturing the throbbing and such) LOL..

Jazz................ aka Jazzy Jazz

[Richard🖌]

Goodness, jasmine!
I'll never know how I missed this sweet review of my first poems? I must fallen asleep … LOL!
Thank you for your always entreating praise that inspires me and gratifies my humble efforts.

With warmest hugs 'n brightest smiles! ⁓ Richard

[J. J. Nightingale]

I had forgotten too...lol... You are welcome Richard..

[Devons]

A flowering, gentle design of love. Very much the classical sonnet. It's interesting that such a poem should relate to such a girl as the image depicts, but love is strange...to many people love is not the first thing that comes into their minds when they see this picture. It puts a quite different complexion on the interpretation of her.
I find such work difficult to review outside of style, since I find the subject of love mostly limited in depth. So forgive me for not offering anything on the content.
Well-written piece though.

[Devons]

As a matter of fact the girl in question is very much a thing of the 60s. Infamously so.
As for love poems - yes, maybe so but it depends what kind of love poems. Love has many guises!

[Richard🖌]

Thanks for the read, Devon, and for your comments and final praise of the composition, itself.
To that which I see in the girl, as you undoubtedly realize, many tend to view things in different ways, and she very much reminds me of a go-go girl I once fell in-love with back in the '60s … she still comes to mind every now and again.
By a widely dominant consensus, a majority of the greatest poetry ever written are love poems; not that mine are amongst them, of course … LOL!
Again, Dear Devon, my sincere thanks! ⁓ Richard

[Richard🖌]

Well, I have other love poems on here, or more correctly, poems that have love parts in them you might give a fairer opportunity to suit your fancy, if you've a mind to try them. One Sonnet is "How you'll know I Love You", and a few Free Verses, as I see you tend toward.

[Devons]

All I mean to say is that I find it difficult to analyse subjective love poems which only present one positive view (ie. how much someone loves someone else). I like there to be an angle one can discuss, or perhaps learn something new. I don't dismiss the subject out of hand.

PS I don't tend toward 'free verse'; in fact I would say the opposite :)

[~]

A skillful pen that captures some deeply romantic vows - the most befit types for this kind of write.
I love the word choice and how you softly introduce the lovers plight to the beloved.
There is nothing more that can make a heart grow fonder than the heartaches, and it is in those times, when love grows deeper and stronger.
Beautiful!! :D

[Richard🖌]

Dear Lady-Poet ~
As I read through the gift of your knowing, praising words of my romantically creative fantasies, it struck me gleefully how truly intelligent and unique you are … no one speaks the way you do or composes with such a completely conscious voice without having been there, done that!
You've convinced me already that I've had the lucky pleasure to discover a genuinely gifted poetess … I hope you'll not mind me saying all this, but some things just want to dance out from the core.
Yes, the "heartaches", and nothing is anymore enthralling than making-up afterwards, eh?
That you consider anything of me as "Beautiful" is beyond my wildest, most appreciative, and humble hopes … I bow most gratefully and deeply to your lovely self! ~ Richard

[~]

wow.. you wrong yourself too much by only praising my review, for it is your work that let my words flow. Looking forward to reading more of you :D

[Richard🖌]

Me, too … yours mine and me Yours~*

[Richard🖌]

I'll be sure to give you more …

[ANTO]

It has a gentle smooth, pleasurable flow to it.

'how your bouquet flows through each aching pore' - I can see the writer close their eyes and sniff the air gently with head tilting back as if trying to catch every molecule of air.

I loved the delicate 'lacey' feel to it and the divine sentiments of this distance relationship but the 'throbbing veins' kinda felt like a piece of ice in a soft luxury ice cream - it crunched right there - for me, dear poet.

anto

[Richard🖌]

Thank you, Anto, for selecting this sensual little piece to read and review.
Your enjoyment and praise gratify my efforts; as-well, your splendidly-worded critique (poetry within itself) of that sensual line, and I would concur with your sentiments had I not mentioned that it is "softly sensual" poem, and I cannot imagine that its expressed passion, desire, imagination, etc; would not help but inspire a "surge through every throbbing vein".
Are there other ways and words I could have used to say it? Of course, but I thoroughly how dreams of her surge and make my veins throb. :)
I well definitely give your thoughts on this line some honest consideration, though, and I absolutely appreciate and enjoy you sharing your take on this "softly sensual" Sonnet.

May your own dreams speak to you with wondrous bliss!
Thanks again, My Fine Friend! ~ Richard

[Richard🖌]

Please, forgive my typos, Anton!

[ANTO]

Well to be honest in retrospect the throbbing vein was not as bad as I had first thought - I made an assumption - that was a mistake because we have throbbing veins throughout the body not just in the erect penis. I guess I 'exposed' my own 'shortcomings' there Richard. And my Catholic upbringing lol Perhaps the crunch I heard was my own crusty ideas breaking of what a sonnett is.
Thank you for the feedback and the enlightening conversation princely Sonneteer.

[Richard🖌]

I knew you'd join-in with the spirit … LOL!