Take This Pain

Frozen and diminished.  My mind screaming, your mouth yelling.  What can I
do, when the pain I feel is beyond the point of toleration.  Where can I
go to escape a fate that is more painful than the thought of death
itself.  Losing you has taken a toll on my ever decreasing self
confidence, but this is more.  With this you have made me a coward,
taken apart by your words of total delirium.  My ears forced to bear
witness to the ever growing sound of your total destruction.  Today I
gave in and saw at once the mistake that it told.  My witness means
nothing as I fight for control of the ever crushing hold you have upon
my heart.  Take your hand away and I die, yet keep it where it is and I
can't stand it.  Confusing begins to describe only a fraction of what I
feel and through these words I find a sort of comfort.  A kind of grace
that comes with not having to listen and speak what you wish but what I
want.

Author's Note

Tell me what I should do differently please!!!! Thanks!!! :-)

Reviews

[KAREN]

I like it alot. It's full of emotion and pain, so much that the reader can feel it. The story is deep, it really cuts to the core.

[Richard Anthony Goulart]

Yes I have thought about that myself and Just honestly have not gotten around to it lol I will do that now though.

[dreaming dame]

:) The only thing that I think could be changed, not to be rude, but the second sentance, wouldn't it make a little more sense if you put a comma between screaming and your? :) Other than that, I think this is a wonderful, and deep creation. :)