Hell has nothing to do with it

Written to reflect the feelings of a dear friend of mine. Never judge someone for things they have done in the past... they already judge themselves.

It's cold.

It's so cold, I'm freezing but my skin melts onto my skeleton like ice in the sun. It is infused with rancid, black pulp that bubbles and writhes underneath the flesh, consuming me from the inside.

I am so tired.

I'm exhausted from the hours and hours of painful, contorted nightmares unable to lie flat on the mattress as my bones break; snapping and splintering and creaking under the pressure of my tensed, twisted muscles.

My eyes sting, bleeding and weeping and fading as the blood vessels burst into the milky whiteness... and I am so full of rage and anger and loathing. Where does this come from? Is this my soul?

My hands shake; my fingers bend back onto my wrists one by one as my spine twists and bends in ways unnatural.

My anatomy. What am I? What is this thing inside of me? It has taken over every fiber. It pinches every nerve and pulls every hair.

I must scream. Someone must know how much this hurts... they must relieve me. Kill me... please let them kill me. Shoot me like a dog unfit to work the fields, a lame horse, a black cat, a starving rat dying slowly and painfully after tasting the sweet, sweet poison.

I scream.

It wasn't me! It has taken my voice and now it speaks in tongues... but there is more than one. I am taken by more than one of these monsters. Why does the world punish me like a w***e?

And then I realize...

These monsters. They are men.

They are simply men.

They asked how much and I gave them my price... but my price, I now know my price. It is my soul they have bought, not my body.

The voices are just the overlapping moaning and groaning and cursing of men; their filthy, distorted and repulsive minds working all at the same time, playing with my body like a new toy.

But...

I must think. I must be rational about this.

Are they really the repulsive ones? After all... if I gave them a price, is it not their right to buy?

Then I am the repulsive one. I have lead them into this disgusting act... and now I deserve nothing than to endure it.

I will endure.

 

I am just a demon possessing these men.

Author's Note

Advise away :)