They won't sparkle if your eyes don't first

A Poem by Mandy

Lose love. Gain new love. The first time it didn't start out real. But it grew to become so strong. This time I held high hopes that things would turn out the same. But my heart remains with the one I lost. And this time, I highly doubt that will change.

The stars only shine as bright as the mind of the beholder.

The perfect in discription can never distract my tourmenting facination with the darkest burning star of yesterday.

Still I strive, my pointless attempts just serving purpose to remind me.

Even through the chaos, I still hold certinty in the capability of another senseless wonder to fix the twisting of my mind, if only the moment present itself, and could I find a way to set a one way evergrowing fire to rest without the guilt of commiting the same murder that has been cast upon my own self, as I know what dark days that can bring.

Those same simple acts I once carried out as if nothing now just bring about vibrant flashbacks of where and upon whom such simple acts felt right to carry out.

Is it only in my blood to hold harsh comparisons to such distinct individuals?

I'm searching for some kind of indication that this, too, will in time turn as intense as my heart has learnt to feel in the past, only to recieve constant reminders that my heart will, in fact, remain in silent monotone until bined with one of which I feel it instantly.

Searching for any kind of similarities between both new begginings, only to have doubt grow larger and larger.

I can't force feed this time. There will be no transition, all will remain the same.

I stand sorry to let it become known that I can only display synthetic smiles for so long before I must find a way to break off, to continue my misary alone.

Your company only deepens my pain, and I can't say a damn word.

The truth brings about pain. It has for me, and I hold no doubt that those same truths I got fed at such inappropriote times will do the same to you.

Alas, out of my endless worries, the one held the highest, if not by choice, within my mind is the desperation and desire to feel something just as real, only comforting, joyfull, strong, and unbreakable.

Not to be ripped apart by elements haveing no right dare enter the tight bond I wished could have formed.

As ill as it makes my heart to let this be known, I must move forward to better nights, you must move forward to better nights, and so must he.

All without the company of the other in which we strive to be accompanied by.

I ache to let this be known, this haunting truth which is reality.

The stars in the sky I perceive late at night apear dull and lifeless, for my mind shines not bright, but unwillingly embraces this darkness that won't seem to leave.

I shall remain with the last bit of hope and optimism I have left, where all else has deceased, burned away by convincing situations proveing my failure at this game, and hold this statement dear-it is not if, but when. It is not unless, but until.