The snake tattoo

The snake tattoo

A Story by Red swallow
"

Do all people have tattoos because they think they look good? Or have they had them since they were born?

"
My body filled with agony, It rippled through my veins I felt it rip through my body, I felt it surge toward my heart. It began to get faster and faster. I screemed till my throat ran dry, I screeched and cursed till I started to choke and cough up blood. I could taste it in my mouth, the metallic bitter substance wash inside. I could feel it clog up in my throat the sickening thirst for it. I open my eyes in excruciating pain. My eyes were blurred and had ox blood tears in them. my nose was on fire and I looked down to the floor where I had spluttered to see black goo hot and moving it slithered to my arms. It was heart thumping and it was painful. I didn't have time to feel scared or angry or anything but I lifted up my long black shirt to reveal a black snake tattoo it started moving and board into my skin that's when I blacked out I can't remember anything before that but now I can only see black,a cold horrid black, a hell black. My head starts to spin and my spin begins to break it burns and I screem out but nothing happens, I'm stuck in my black cage cursed in torture as I feel my body start to rip apart and my bones disintegrate. My eyes begin to open but takes a couple of tries to focus. I try to stand up but I can't so I reach a hand out but yet again I can't.
I turn to see what's the problem and a slink black scaly tail greets my eyes as yet again I fall back into my cage of black.

© 2017 Red swallow


Author's Note

Red swallow
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Reviews

I like the dark gothic mood you created.

Technically I have a couple of points:
1. You switch tenses "It rippled" is past tense. "I turn" is present tense. Either is OK, mixing them up - not so OK.
2. Lots of great descriptions, but maybe some inner dialogue, or more about the characters feelings would elevate those descriptions to a higher level.

Posted 7 Years Ago



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Added on April 26, 2017
Last Updated on April 26, 2017
Tags: #tattoo, #snake

Author

Red swallow
Red swallow

Sheffield , United Kingdom



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I write because I love to, I read because I want to, Books shall forever have a place in my heart more..

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