On The Road

Me and my family are headed to Toronto, and it seems I can use my father's phone as an internet hotspot. Inspiration struck, and-bam! This.

Cramped in the backseat 

Backpacks squashing my feet

Out the window I see

A couple thousand plain trees.

Toronto seems so far off

Seems as far as Endor from Hoth

It's getting sorta hot

Better take my blanket off.

I'm so bored I might die

In Minecraft, you can fly

"Darn! I wish I was in that game," curses I

And I setlle back in my seat, daydreaming...waiting for night.

Author's Note

I think the first verse was good, and the other's weren't.....

Reviews

[Constance Payne]

I like this, all of this.
We took many a 1500 mile trips when I was a kid from Ft. Myers Beach Florida to Cheney Kansas cramped in the back seat with a sister who drove me to distraction with the grumbles of a younger sibling.
I enjoyed this as it increased memories.

[Isabelle Howard]

Thank you! My family drove to Orlando, Florida, once or twice. That was WAY more cramped then to Toronto.

[Goldfrog]

I disagree with your note, Isabelle.
A tree is a tree is a tree, and, after "a couple thousand plain trees" your poem follows the natural psychological slide into boredom. Attention first turns to the body "getting sorta hot," to escaping, "fly", to the familiar, safe exit "daydreaming...waiting for night."
After all, if you've seen one tree in a Canadian forest, then you've seen them all - you're "On The Road" to an inevitable slide into boredom. Good work!

[Isabelle Howard]

Thanks for the advice! I really was terribly bored when I wrote this, and maybe it leaked into my work.

[Dominic Morgan]

Again it captured my soul from the start but you mustn't make spelling mistakes ...its unproffffffessssional!!-setlle!!?

[Isabelle Howard]

Okay, noted. What did I misspell?