AchingPains

A really old poem I wrote a while back

 Aching Pains

Sometimes a dagger isnt enough
even those dull serrated razors
Not even the dark words that I spew into sentences 
to create these poems that are looked over briefly
and the messages analysed incorrectly.
No, If I need to cause myself Pain
   All I have to do is be with those people I call schoolfriends,
Though which ones I will leave anonymous
Your like my own personal syringe of pain,
Your like cyanide if I stand with you for too long
Your almost a drug, that I can overdose with and still come out unscratched
on the outside, 
however every minute i spend with you all
the quicker
the inside of me, 
melts and grows attached.
Which makes leaving you all that little bit harder
  Even if farewells bring new Begginings the damage will already have been dealt

But sometimes maybe fading away is a good thing
not away from other lives and into others but away from everyones lives
permenantly...
These thoughts pass through my mind when I stand with some of you
      The way you discriminate sexualities and religeons, even if those discriminations
   might just be jokes to you.
You must make them bravely, or you have to be one of the 
     most stubborn group of people I may have ever met,
    I bet you never consider
I bet it has never even crossed your mind
  whether those that you insult
could ever
ever?
Be among you
hidden 
hiding there truth from you because their afraid
Afraid of saying the truth out loud 
      For the main reason that they dont get any more crap from you
than from if they dont tell you.

  Isnt it time to become the big man
the mature one to suddenly stop and analyse peoples reactions
   Dont immediatly assume that someone who looks unhappy is depressed,
consider pain
consider the alternatives
wouldnt it be a shock
A tremor
or a kick to your soul
  if you found out that actually
Their depression is your fault
.......
     What if my depression was your fault?
It doesnt matter to you really because by the time you
     realise iit will be too late, and from then on you will forever 
be the a*****e that took piss out of them without realising
A true scumbag to this modern day society.

Is that a bit harsh? 
After four years of harrassement without confession
    and 3 years of primary school bullying
      
Its about time I became the mature one...
its time for me to stand up for myself
Im sick of this abuse.
Im standing up for myself




Im not 
confessing

    







Im not telling you 
anything









Im leaving...


Goodbye

Reviews

[Comatose]

Wow....the emotion and honesty beind this is stunning. I love this poem, well done.

[Taylor_Anne_xoxo]

wow. truly breathtaking. it felt like someone was tearing my heart from my chest and piercing it with a thousand needles and sucking me dry. i totally relate...loved it!

[BlyndSikick]

I loved it. Very raw, powerful emotion.

[Mistaken]

wow....this is awesome!!! I love it. This flows really nice and i like the ending keep it up

[shanise]

Wow, I know something along the lines of that, I have been bullied for 7 years and some of my "friends" automatically thought I was depressed, they dont like considering the options.. Anyways, great poem, very well written!